ElizabethAnn 690 Posted January 4, 2008 Author Report Share Posted January 4, 2008 Oh, Tina... I feel your pain! Angela has to keep me away from prospective adoptive parent intake calls, most days, because I just can't abide this kind of ignorance anymore! but I think talking with your pastor is definitely an important first step. Harboring irrational fears of one's child's birthfamily is so detrimental to that child; in my opinion, it borders on child abuse. I do understand that our culture and the media has exploited those apprehensions, but I think anyone who is qualified to adopt should be educated or principled enough to overcome their own feelings of fear to embrace the "whole" of who their child is-- which, yes, includes the people in their family of origin. This doesn't mean, necessarily, that you find their birthparents irresistibly lovable, and move them into your home as well. But it means that you hold an intrinsic respect for the human beings that they are; that you empathize with their loss of their child and the family continuity that was forfeited as a result of their adoption decision; and that you raise your child to feel proud of the people from whom they're descended. If nothing else, does Christian faith not require that we appreciate God's gifts to us, trust in His plan for our families, and love all people? I wonder if perhaps the Holy Spirit is somehow using you, Jay & Tina, to bring healing to the people in your church whose children so surely would benefit, were their parents to overcome their paranoia and thereby embrace them more fully? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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