Garden of Hope

Great comparison/illustration, Elizabeth and so to the heart of things. Well said.

Martha, Thank you for your honest and heartfelt post. I could substitute my name and Nathan's into your post with the except of rocking him to sleep. I loved to rock him when he was little, but he was put to sleep in the crib when he was still awake and he would go to sleep on his own. You and I have to be the tag team support for each other here. Nathan is 4 and I have just now (Since Dec. 27) instituted a bedtime. Currently he has to be in bed by 9. I know that's late by most standards, but I had to start somewhere and being that we often don't even get home til 7, it was doable at this point. I have often said, "I have no sense of time." When I taught I would sometimes set a timer to keep myself on track. I don't eat at a scheduled time. I try to avoid eating, and try to eat when I am hungry. In the last couple of years, Nathan never seems to want to eat. He is a snacker, though. I am moving toward a better stance on this as well. SO, sister.......thanks for posting my biggest parenting mistake and together, we can turn it around. ARe you with me on this one? I work from 9:30-5:30, basically because I'd rather sleep in the morning. (Sound familiar?) I keep thinking that if I can get both of us on a better schedule then I could go in early, get out early, and then Nathan and I would have time to play at home which would help him to feel more ready to go to bed. (He's forever saying, "I want to pway." I tell him, "You played all day." "No," he says, "I want to pway here.") I've also noticed how drastically his mood is altered when he misses the 9:00 bedtime by very much. The earlier bedtime has seemed to improve his attitude toward eating as well. So, if you're a parent and you hear people talk about getting the baby on a schedule, listen. I am an educated person, I've worked with children all my life, and I know better, but I couldn't for the longest time get past my own personal habits/preferences. Well..............say good bye to the old and in with the new. PS. The children who beg to go to bed. Sometimes it has more to do with their personal sleep needs than the schedule. I have a friend who had her kids in bed by 7, but she said it was just what they had to have. She wanted to keep them up and they just wouldn't stay awake. Sometimes they'd try to hide or sneek off to their beds to go to sleep before their bedtime!!!!

It is beautifully glorious! Sorry I missed your call this evening. I'll catch up to you in a day or two. Hugs, Jean

Right there with you, Sabrina!!

Welcome Jen! Why wait til March? You could be parents by then. See if you can get your paperwork and pen on the fast track and attend in January. Usually, the more open you are, the faster your dream comes true. Just wanted to say WELCOME and tell you that if you are open and meet the requirements, it's only a matter of when you become parents not if.

When I filled out the application for Abrazo, I have to admit that I checked off every ethnicity with the exception of African American. I believe it was done out of ignorance. When Kelly and I talked prior to orientation, I had left a message about whether I was good to go for the weekend, she said she had been looking at my application and noticed that I hadn't checked that option. At that moment, I said, "Talk to me about it." She proceeded to tell me, "We have a perfectly healthy little boy in Houston who's ready to go home." I told her to give me a little time to think and pray about it. After I hung up the phone, I called a very dear friend of mine who said, "HOW COULD YOU SAY NO?" And the realities were that I could not. I wanted to be a mom. I wanted a child to love and raise. I wanted to adopt a baby. Here was a healthy, beautiful baby boy who needed a family. I called Kelly back probably sooner than she expected and told her to send me the case paper work. That afternoon I met with my social worker and updated my home study. A few days later, Nathan came home forever. It would have been sooner, but I had to meet obligations at work. (I learned about Nathan on a Friday morning and brought him home on Tuesday.) I cannot imagine being mom to any other child. Do I worry? Absolutely. What parent doesn't? Do I stand by my decision. No doubt. Do I have regrets. NO. Was I open to an African American child when I started the adoption journey? Not really. It was so easy just to leave that box unchecked. Out of sight, out of mind--don't want to think that hard or that deep. I shudder to think of what I would have missed out on if I had held fast to my ignorance and fear. I ache to think of the growth my immediate family and friends close to me would have missed out on. I think about the new relationships and perspectives I've gained as a result of my decision. Nathan has blazed some trails that would never have been given a glance let alone now become a favorite place to be. Do I think everyone should adopt a child regardless of ethnicity? When a person says, "I just want a baby to love," does it make me angry to know there are newborn babies waiting in limbo that these same people turn their backs on due to the pigment of their skin and the culture they do not understand? Do I secretly thank God that those before me chose not to risk when asked about parenting Nathan? The answer to these questions are a resounding "YES". Do I understand the fear and ignorance? Absolutely. Am I an expert on the subject? Absolutely not. But when it came down to brass tacks, I had to look at my most basic desire. The bottom line was that I wanted to be a mom. I wanted to have a child. It didn't matter that he didn't look like me. It didn't matter that I didn't know much about the African American culture. What did matter was that I was willing to love him, do my best for him, and learn what I didn't know. I learn every day. I worry every day. I love him every day and thank God for opening my heart and mind every day.

Aw, that's SO sweet. Congratulations, kids!!!

What a happy surprise to log into the gallery and see the Singh's with a new baby girl! I stared at the picture marveling at the joy and thinking, WOW! Then I read her name and said it again, WOW--beautiful! Next I had to hit the baby announcements to see just what was up and sure enough, it is true. I'm so very happy for you Kathy and Tom. Maya and Ariana are going to be such close and blessed sisters. YEE HAH! I'm shouting and singing over here in New Braunfels! Come on, Pamela, when you catch up on your sleep, please post a picture or two of Maya and Ariana or the whole family! I still can't get over what a cool surprise. And welcome to the TWEENERS, Singh family! There's room for many a' more!

Congratulations to Brian and Gail and their birthfamily. You've only just begun and what a blessed way to start the new year! Congratulations!!

Congratulations on being ahead of the game and on top of things. Remember, if you have everything in, sometimes the angels smile on you and you place BEFORE you attend orientation. We call that group "tweeners" and I am a tweener from 2002. So, full steam ahead and don't look back!

AWESOME NEWS, KAREN!!

Nichole, Abrazo has a wonderful saying, "It's not if, but when". So, as soon as your inquiry is reviewed and accepted, don't waste any time in getting the packet filled out. You will need a letter from your physician confirming the diagnosis of infertility, a recent physical, letter from insurance confirming that they will cover an adopted child at time of placement, and of course, begin your homestudy. If you have those things in the works then whatever agency you go with , you'll be ahead of the "game". And remember, the faster you return all the required paperwork and documentation, the faster you'll be on your way to parenthood. If you are open to a variety of ethnicities, your wait could be much shorter as well. Once again, welcome to the Abrazo Forum. We're glad you're here.

Great link, thanks!

I found it, but couldn't get it to play. I'll have to try later when I'm in more of a techno mode. I loved the picture, though. What a precious little one and what a wonderful beginning for mom.

I chuckled when I read your post. It's a little known, or widely known, I'm not sure, fact that some Abrazo couples have actually "staged" their photos taking them in all in one day with many clothing changes and location changes. Maybe your hubby would like to go on a photo shoot and practice looking in a manner he would consider "non-nerdy"!!!!! Just a thought. I think birthmoms will notice your sense of humor and think you are smart. (Lawyer, they have to be "smart," right?) Everyone worries about how birthparents will see their profiles, but it is true that if you create them to reflect the real essence of you as a couple and as individuals the "right" birthmom will be drawn to it and will begin a conversation with you. At that point it's up to the interactions to solidify the feelings and drive what comes next. Remember, the birthparents worry about what you will think of them, too. It's sort of like dating. Getting to know you................ We're all rooting for you.

I've always heard "the truth will set you free," and your story is proof. What a special man your grandfather was to have all of his grandchildren on his marker. What a bittersweet affirmation of his love for you as well. Thank you for sharing.

Congratulations to the newest Abrazo family and the awesome birthmom that made it all possible. Blessings upon all of you for a continued perfect match that lasts a lifetime.

I'm thinking that the 512 numbers would work for Texas residents, but maybe not out of state folks. Just my guess, though.

Congratulations on your completion of your inquiry. You're one step closer to parenthood!

Yes you can!!! Praise the Lord! And sadly, I'm afraid, continues to this day even more than anyone probably wants to admit. Such a travesty in history and the black market continuing through current day.

Very well said Nita.

As the excitement remains, I personally feel an amazing calm, warmth, and peace. Mandy, You are absolutely glowing in your picture, with proud Daddy Dane by your side. I wish I could be a fly on the wall when Kaitlyn and Emma meet for the first time. Your pming buddy, Jean

I think we all should acknowledge their courage and example by purchasing at least one calendar per family. What do ya'll think? Thanks for the link, Elizabeth. You have a great eye for fabulous and appropriate articles!

Interesting poem. I am glad we live in a day and time/country where it is possible to own a cottage near a wood and the squirrel in the cage, etc. However the out of date words, "buy a little orphan-girl" made me cringe.

What a precious picture of the proud parents and gorgeous new little sister of Jordan. Let the fun begin!! Congratulations! Elizabeth, I love your announcement posts. Thanks for another perfect synopsis!.