HeidiK

I wonder how many birth parents pass up potential adoptive parents for the exact same reasons.. Let me explain When waiting for Gabriel : I marked open to everthing for the very reason(s) elaborated by Elizabeth because I wanted to be presented to potential birth families as often as possible, and I was afraid that I would miss my "child" and I worked hard at NOT trying to picture what my child would really be like. On paper - surely I wasn't anyones perfect match! I was present with some very challenging and difficult situations...most of them when I thought it thru got educated and prayed.. I discovered I was really open to most . Gabriel's "situation" had a very specific set of challenges inculding Native American heritage, drug exposure and no birthfather inforamtion. Once I made the VERY painful decision to turn down a baby that I learned later passed away in the loving arms of the family that had agreed to foster her. I say a special prayer for them all the time. AND the ironic thing about Gabriel's birthmom is that on her matching sheet she selected: African American or Biracial only VERY FIRM, Christian VERY IMPORTANT, stay at home mom, other child in the home. Not exactly a perfect fit - with a single working Jewish mom, no other kids and gulp...40 yrs old. Had she not been open to ME ----what we have missed out on! What makes the differnce - is having agenies and social workers invested in the VERY best interests of all the clients that they work with. Latonya ( Gabe's Birthmom) looked at the profiles of the families that fit her "check list", and then afterwards the SW also showed her a few others that were also open to the specifics aurrounding her child, and I was in that stack. When we met - it was a great fit for us both.... I guess the bottom line is that NOBODY - is really exactly what they appear to be on paper, and decisions to accept a match or decline really need to be on so many other things...like connection, faith, love, shared values and ideals...and oh yea...listening to the whispers that assure you that you are making the right choice.

awesome..thanks for sharing

Well done Mona...now where is the photo!

Baby Womble is OFFICIAL...................HURRAY!

Speaking of support...I want to THANK Jean and Nathan for a wonderful day at the zoo. It was such a blessing to connect with another family just like mine! Jean - You know I love you sister! And your amzing son too! PS _ Big hugs for the warm welcome from MathaJ and Catherine - Gabe is still talking about his friends in San Antonio

Dearest Lisa, Yet again you have reminded me that with each situation that comes our way, we always have the opportunity to re-choose. We can always be different, react different and change to help our children and/or ourselves. Bravo for your MOM for becoming your MOM again....I am just sorry that it took a pregnancy for her to come around again. But I shudder to think what you all would have missed out on had she not been willing to embrace you in that exact moment I watched the Oprah episode today. It was heart-breaking to think that any young woman would need to go to such lenghts for acceptance, for a boy friend....for any thing. But looking back on my past, their are some things that I did for acceptance that I am not that proud of. I would agree with you, that there seemed to be a disconnectedness, Jessica said all the right words but emotions or facial experssions didn't really add up. And the opportunity to make a HUGE statement was missed. My prayers are with all the young girls tonight hiding something from those that love them. Heidi

How are you doing Grandma Sharon? I remember picking my Mom up at the airport when Gabriel was 1 week old, and she almost fainted. Hope you stayed upright!

Claudia, I always knew you were an angel. The gift of time is often the hardest thing to give. A big hig to you for giving that special gift to a little babe in need of the magic of touch, Hugs Heidi

I can't remember what article about Madonna and Guy ( but mostly about Madonna, and why isn't Mr Richie standing up to defend his rights as an adoptive father...another post) talked about Meg Ryan's adoption of a little girl from China. What stood out in my mind was the bit about her trying for 10 unsucessful years to adopt domestically before she went overseas. What does that mean? Honestly, was that tid bit included to take a cheap shot at domestic adoption. And how come, since adoption is on the front page, no one talks about how African American kids in the USA are the last to be adopted OR they are adopted by Canadians or others outside of the USA?

OMG...I have come a VERY LONG WAY in a VERY SHORT time. This post was dated 2/1/06. My son Parker was born 2/7/06 at 7pm. In LESS than 7 days...I became a MOM for the 2nd time. In the past 9 months, I have learned so much about open adoption ( thought I knew it all), raising a child, and made some amazing friends. I have cried with some of my new freinds as they became parents witnessed the courage of some spectacular birth familes and cried with others as things didn't go as planned. I have learned about patience and the value of good communication (again) I have know I have become a better woman, a better friend, and a better mother. Many blessings to all of you !

May the rainbow of happiness forever link the latest families. May Abby always be the pot of gold at the end of that raindbow.

excellent article......I am still trying to decide how I feel about this whole thing. but in the mean time, I hope that this little boy is adjusting to his new surroundings and finds the love and happiness all children deserve

Who knew!

I think that the stork is on vacation....and we all want him back soon!

Sabrina, You have some great friends, and I am sure they love that you have ventured back into the dating pool. Have a great time... Heidi

Very Funny - Ms Social Worker. But the whole thing really makes me sick.... What good can come of this..really. The poor country waived all of its processes that it had in place to protect its child, for Madonna's money? The rest of "us" couldn't adopt from that country if we wanted to...so why can Madonna. I think her money would be better used by sponsering an orphange and/or schools

Welcome little one....and welcome to the newest familes!

Here's wishing peaceful hearts to all involved...and prayers for the couple as they move forward. Martha - My best friend was married twice before her 21st birthday( 1st the day after high school and then later to her 1st husband best freind), and then lastly in her late 30's to her soulmate and best friend. She always held her head high...but it was sometimes hard to explain. She always said she married the men that other girls would have just Dated... Anyway...sometimes is just as hard to explain why I have never been married...and feel the need to review my past relationship history...as if I should explain it all and why I didn't get married to this one and that one...blah blah...

Welcome to Jonah, Lilly, Ava and Emma. What beautiful babies, what happy adoptive and birth families. The pictures are spectacular. May the blessings of health, happiness and laughter stay will all of you always.

Alison, People are in our path for reasons and seasons...I am so happy that this part of the adoption process is now in your review mirror. Amen heidi

Happy New Year to all of my forum friends. The Jewish holiday of Rosh Hasanah begins with sunset tonight. This will be the VERY 1st time I have been to Temple during the Jewish Holy Days and I will be taking my boys to a special children's service. As I was researching the meaning of this holdiay for myself, I found this link that I would like to share... http://www.jewfaq.org/holiday2.htm

Welcome sweet baby boy. May you life be filled with laugher and kindness. May you always know love and the best of health. May your birth family be blessed as well. Amen

What a blessing! May your sleepless nights be few...who am I kidding...Stay up all night and stare at their faces. heidi

Blessings to all those that are touched by this amazing story. This is a loved child...period! Welcome little girl into the family called Abrazo. Here's to the newest parents...may the sleepless nights be few, and the hugs and kisses many!

I have a poem in my head and hot wheels in my purse That sounds like the 1st line to a country western tune.... I am still laughing