txladybug85

See!!! Yay!! I knew there had to be other families that wanted to get together just not everyone is as blunt as me i guess ahahaha Ok so warning in advance thats easy enough! Awww Sea World he's gonna have a blast! I used to go every summer and actually discovered i can make a noise just like a dolphin it was a great talent because it was the only thing that made my brother keep a distance from me as fear of embarassment I will start a notebook of ideas and names for this gathering and be sure to put ya'll in it...any other in put,requests etc...are more than welcome!!! Thanks!!

awww Melissa im excited you'll be in town we have to get together even if the reunion doesnt plan out in time We'll one of the best responses we've had is our Christmas Party at Alamo Cafe @ 2 years ago or so. Maybe it's an idea to re-visit. So what brings you to SA in December? (quote) wow that sounds nice a little christmas party huh what happened to them? I was thinking maybe a picnic potluck type thing at a state park in the area maybe on the outskirts enough to be convienent to both the San Antonio families and to maybe the Houston,Corpus area families too......I know Texas is HUGE and getting everyone together would be a hassle but maybe a south Texas gathering would work?maybe a little mini day camp Abrazo hahahaha

So E and myself were talking today and we are very envious of the out of state families that get together and have little reunions.....so seeing that there are several families in Texas we are wondering why us lonestars dont get together????/ just a thought

Melissa i (as always) love how you phrase things and how you view things. Fran i like how you are looking at it,most birthmoms have the same goals and dreams for their Aps. In group today i was trying to explain to a new BP that its hard to keep in mind that our fears are similar to yalls (APS) fears.I know my phone calls i didnt think of that at all and now its all i think about.And to remember honesty and being up front about all things is just as comforting to the APS as it is to us.

Well i will get to this in my story but i dont mind answering now. I found out i was pregnant (not a shocker since i had neglected protection like a dummy) while i was with my then fiance.We had been friends for several months but only been dating for a little over a month.He was getting ready to deploy and decided he wanted me to plan my future with him.Then i found out i was pregnant-i had food poisoning and he made me take an at home test in defense of his favorite restaurant poisoning me-I started crying when i saw the cross pop up before i could even flush the toilet,this was not what i needed right now.I had no money,no car,no job...nothing i had nothing but this beautiful man in front of me who was leaving for war in a month.Then i cried more when he was so excited-i knew the chances of me having conceived before we got together was large.I have a bad habit of using sex as therapy and the month before he and i made it official i had been doing just that.But i couldnt say it out loud as he started planning a job when he got home (he gets out of the army upon his return from deployment) a home to buy near this new job,names-he even called his parents.I felt sick to my stomach.On one hand i was scared to let go and fall into this dream come true i would finally have the family i always wanted-But what if its not his?What then? I went to a clinic in Kansas (i was at Fort Riley at this point with my little brother) that said they read your HGC levels or something adn they could tell me how far along i am for free......i wanted to know before he left for over seas........so i went and they said i was just a few weeks so i got excited i started planning names and everything else with Travis.I moved to TX with my sis n law and didnt really rush seeing a Dr i was barely pregnant right n biggie. Well we went to a christian pregnancy center to get my proof of pregnancy for medicaid and they did a normal ultrasound......i was 16 weeks!! omg this is not good.That means its not travis' and i have to tell him while he is at war.I didnt do or think about much with the baby for the next couple weeks and i didnt go get or see a doctor it was like my life paused waiting for him to call,i begged him to call i refused to tell him via facebook messenger.Then he did call and all i could do was cry i told him the baby wasnt his and i was certain and i was sorry,he just said ok.I asked what he wanted me to do?He said its your baby its your decision but im going home to Florida when i get back now the rest is on you. So i was on my own for a few days i thought about toughing it out and being a single mom,but the overwhelming family support for an engaged to a soldier at war girl vanished when i became an ex convict single mom.I was kicked out of my sis n laws and my mom and i had been through this the summer before and i knew i couldnt live with her pregnant or with a baby-i had nowhere to go,no money...yeah back to nothing.I was 21 weeks and i had seen one obgyn who just took my blood and did an ultrasound.I felt detached already.I knew i couldnt take care of this baby but because of the whole Christopher thing i felt like if i admitted that i was admitting i couldnt be a mom-it was tough but easy if that makes sense.I had no doubt adoption was my option it was figuring out how to have an adoption like my friend tori's.And doing it all with no help because my mom refused to even acknowledge i was pregnant.Then i found Abrazo and E&J(yall know the details lol) and it gets easier everyday,i have more peace and excitement about E&J raising Riley than i did about me and Travis im sure that sounds odd but its true. So thats my side lol

Well im glad it's mutual

Hannah this is so funny that you would ask my opinion on this as i just had this conversation today.But i love giving my point of view or experience (as little as it is lol) because everyone else has helped so much with their input.I went back to the first post here and read all the posts it's a very interesting topic actually i wish i had these questions when i was making my three phone calls!! haha although Audra tried really hard to find some for me i went in "blindfolded".I had gotten the folder from Abrazo in the mail the day after i called and requested it.I had actually gotten a folder from another agency in town as well but the two were polar opposites.Abrazo's folder was welcoming with ribbons and a pen and bright colors and information to help guide me.While the other was a plain folder no extras and alot of questions for me to answer and pages to fill out.It was an easy decision on which agency i would go with! (thank God) So in Abrazos folder were all the "available" families profiles i think about 8 or 9.I thought the way they were like little sections from a scrapbook was cute.And immediately jumped into looking them over;well that quickly turned into studying them ALL night! I can't really pin point what things made me put a profile in the "done" pile (the pile i was done looking at) but i remember the ones with funny pictures like E&J with a rake in the garden or a canoe paddle in the living room or Kim and Gip with their funny plant picture-these stood out.I felt like they had a sense of humor and an imagination instead of just telling me she liked to garden under a picture of her garden E had the funny yoga (of course) pose with the rake in her garden.I think the profiles that included pictures of their home and/or their extended family caught my attention;i felt like if they were willing to let me in by showing me pictures of their more personal life then they would be more likely to let me into that side of their life and the adoption would be more open. Also the bright colors and funny little stickers made me feel "welcome" were some were darker and more thoughtful.I LOVED the little notes from J about E and vise versa it should me a little about their relationship.So thats how i got the group down to two couples before i went to Abrazos office. Honestly i knew i wanted E&J from the beginning it was sorry to say a "gut instinct" they seemed eclectic and quirky and open minded.With my past i really needed open minded and non judgmental and i am very blunt and can be offensive at times unintentionally and i knew i needed a couple that could "handle" me.They just seemed like they could.So i went to Abrazo and showed Audra the two couples i had chosen she of course asked what it was about each and i fumbled in trying to explain but she could tell i was leaning drastically toward E&J (her and Brianna plotted on that and had me call E last of the three calls by the way hehehe) I was explained about the three calls and so i looked back over the profiles and chose a third couple to call just to get a better feel for this process.I hadnt planned on talking to any APs so i definitely didnt plan on making a decision as big as this in one day either,but i would make the calls.I wanted questions or a guideline or something i had no clue what to say or ask it was very scary.I felt like this was the biggest decision i had to make and i didnt want to rush or fumble but i was going in blind and that scared me.Brianna told me i would be in the conference room and to answer the phone when it rang adn it would be an Ap mom to talk to.The first conversation went great she was really nice and helped ease the conversation (she actually reminded me of Tori's Ap mom) but they needed more from me than i could give and they deserved what they wanted so i knew Riley wasnt their baby.The second phone call went ok at first then got a little awkward when my felony and the fact that i dont know who Rileys dad is came up i could hear judgment in her voice and i knew she was a nice lady but not Rileys future mom.Then FINALLY Brianna let me talk to E and she was just as nervous as i was we fumbled around conversation laughing at each other but having a great conversation.I felt peace when we hung up (i ended it because Riley was playing with my bladder lol) When i got Audra i told her i was pretty sure i wanted E&J but i didnt want to rush so since it was Thursday i would call her Monday once id really thought and prayed on it.However fate had other plans,i called Audra to ask a question about something else and she mentioned that some new BPs had come in and were looking at "my couple" just so i could have a back up choice.I hung up and got mad i didnt want a back up couple i wanted E&J dang it! So i called Audra back and told her i had made my decision and she laughed knowing all along that i had.When E&J called and we talked for a long time we clicked and i knew with every fiber that i had found Rileys future parents and my friends.And everytime we talk even in text or in deep conversation i am reminded that we are all a perfect match. So Hannah thats my input and story lol hope it gives someone some insight they may need.