Well, another birthmother posting here about Juno. The funny thing is that I didn't cry when I saw Juno....... I think I may have detached myself from it. It still doesn't feel as though there is a baby growing inside of me, and that I am going to have a baby in about 20 days. It's just crazy. I think I am a lot like Juno dealing with adoption. For the first part of my adoption (until very recently) I have been depending mostly on myself to get through the adoption, and trying to put a strong front on. A big part of this is because I really need people to see that adoption is a good thing, a beautiful thing, and in my case the absolute best thing. I don't think Bleaker was being a ditching birth father- he didn't know how to react to that, and backed off because that's what Juno requested of him. He was there for her as soon as he got the intuition that she was going into labor. He even kept her underwear (weird, I know) and the movie gave me the impression that he read her yearbook message over and over again. I guess I'm just going through the experience that I am in no contact at all with my ex, and there is no way he would have been there for me in the adoption process. But I don't think Bleaker was in the wrong.
I also don't think people are giving Vanessa a big enough chance. When Juno, her dad, Mark, Vanessa and the lawyer sat down to discuss the adoption process and plan, the lawyer said that Mark and Vanessa were willing to negotiate a semi-open adoption with Juno, and Juno turned that down. She did not want any contact after birth (which I can't imagine- I can't NOT know the baby I'm carrying!), and Vanessa was simply respecting her wishes by not pursuing contact. If Juno wanted contact, she had their phone number, address, and knew where they lived. I'm sure she could have gotten contact if she wanted it.
I think this movie will have a different effect on me after this precious little baby is born. I'm almost sure of it. Right now, though, I cannot help but admire Juno- she sacrifices everything for this little baby, and I'm jealous in some ways about how mature and steady she is in her decision! I struggle much more than she does, and I wish it were that easy. Adoption is definitely not an easy decision. I believe this is the case for adoptive parents as well. I think they experience heart break, loss, insecurities, and fears, even if they are completely different than those of us birth mothers. Juno is so smart and strong. I'm a baby- I cry all the time when I think about the fact that I won't be able to raise this baby myself. It's all just very upsetting, and there is a lot of guilt involved in that. It's just hard in general.
I do love the movie though. I think anyone who has gone through adoption should watch it.
