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HeidiK

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Posts posted by HeidiK

  7. Picking & Choosing

    in Looking to Adopt

    Posted

    Birthmothers' Lament

    (e. jurenovich)

    My baby went through some tough times with me:

    I used (to cope with my growing belly.)

    I'm sorry I did it, I know it was wrong.

    Will my child still get placed?

    Will someone let her belong?

    My baby's black, his health is good

    Adoption's scary yet I think I could

    But what a quandry it leaves me in

    To think he's less wanted

    just because of his skin?

    My baby's brown, just like the dad

    His first name was all the info I had.

    It was one of those things, please don't say "tsk!"

    Could you accept my child

    despite the legal risk?

    My baby's white, but came too early.

    They say she'll have some problems, surely.

    I called an agency, they said they'd see

    if they even have

    any families for me?

    My baby's not a baby now.

    It took awhile for me to see how

    I could let go, but now that I'm ready

    would there still be a home

    for my tot and his teddy?

    They say there are plenty of folks out there

    Who want to adopt and have much love to spare.

    Yet children never come risk-free.

    The best hope for their future

    starts with your family.

    Let it be!

    Bumping this topic up today with this poem ( one of my favorites). I PM'd a special friend today about my path to Gabriel and started reading some of the posts on this thread. What surprised me looking back over the posts last night was the number of "girl only" PIW that now have boys or the "not open to AA or biracialAA" families that are now happily raising of children of color. Sometimes looking back at this stuff really makes me smile.

    Have a wonderful day!

  8. Picking & Choosing

    in Looking to Adopt

    Posted

    That's a great question Elizabeth - I wonder if that type of format is even possible. I imagine that it might apeal more to birth families - since it implies that a AP would embarce the child no matter the race - or if the race of the child could not be determined or might be assumed. But I think many PIW feel an sense of entitlement - I didn't get to have a child of my "flesh" so I should at least have a say in the process that matches me with the child of my heart. I think it might be very difficult for most to just let the process happen and trust that you can rasie the child you are entrusted with.

  13. INQUIRY

    in Looking to Adopt

    Posted

    My wife just sent our inquiry in today. I have been reading this forum for a while now, and I think that all of you that post on here are just amazing people. I am actually kind of addicted to this forum. I have gained a lot of knowledge about Abrazo from this forum that I don't think I could have learned anywhere else.

    Thank you everbody,

    Mark

    Three cheers for a Daddy post BEFORE orientation - the ladies at Abrazo LOVE it when the men-folk post! :lol:

    Welcome Erin and Mark - you have made it to a wonderful place.

    may your journey be blessed

  16. Positive Adoption Language

    in Looking to Adopt

    Posted

    I have been reading on another forum the past few days - don't be shocked :lol: But I wanted to pass on a term that I found to my liking. ON that board they refer to preganent woman as EMOM's or expentant mom OR Efamilies, again expentant families before they give birth. That reserves the term birth mother for a woman who has been thru the relishuishment process. Does that make sense? What do you think?

    I know many of us struggle with what to call people but I thout emom was kinder that potential birthmom

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