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MarkLaurie

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  9. Nursery Notes

    in Looking to Adopt

    Posted

    Me too, me too. This is the kind of PM I would love to be able to respond to. In a couple of years, I hope to be the one messaging the STORK. This child is going to be soooo beautiful!

    Someone, please respond!

    I'm with you, Claudia. These special messages always pull at my heart and you never know. I have always thought that maybe one of these sweet children will be meant to be a part of our family in the future. (I can't believe I am thinking about a third child already. :rolleyes: )

  11. INQUIRY

    in Looking to Adopt

    Posted

    You use a local homestudy worker. You will probably be advised to use one that does homestudies regularly so that things go more smoothly. Depending on where you live Abrazo may know some names of people in your area. You want someone that understands Texas adoption requirements. We started our homestudy a little before attending Abrazo's orientation. Getting your homestudy done earlier can speed the process sometimes. :)

  15. Baby Announcements 2008

    in New Arrivals

    Posted

    I have to say Bailey brought sweet tears to my eyes yesterday. After getting home from work, she comes in and pulls the blanket off the the crib and starts carrying it around asking me to hold and rock her. When I asked her what she was doing, she said she was "payin' with sister" (playing with sister). I was rocking with her and when Mark came through he asked what she was holding she said, "sister's bankit" in her sweet little voice. I couldn't help but shed a few tears. It could have just been end-of-the-day fatigue.

    Mark and Laurie,

    I bounced back on a thread to catch up on your journey and found the above post. Seems like Ms. Bailey knew all along what the outcome would be. Didn't she talk about a baby sister a few times without really knowing what was going on? I guess she heard the angels whispering. ;)

    CONGRATULATIONS to all of you as you embark on yet another wonderful adoption journey.

    There is no doubt in mind. My mind also flashes back to several instances like this one over the past 3 months. The most treasured are the out-of-the-blue mentions of baby sister in her little prayers before bed. I also remember our first mention of having a sister and her response to my question of what she would do with her sister - "I laugh". And so today we laugh with joy. :)

  19. La Promesa: Special Needs Adoptions

    in Looking to Adopt

    Posted

    So often, I think, folks come to the adoption process wanting to hold out for the ideal case. It's not that they don't want to see children with special needs go without loving homes; they just want to believe that "someone else" can provide that better than they could. They're "not cut out for" it, they tell themselves (and us), without stopping to think what this might suggest about their level of commitment to any child, since all kids fall far from perfect.

    But if everyone hid behind that theory, then there'd be no special homes for special kids.

    What does it take to be a "special needs family"? What compels someone to make this kind of greater commitment to a child whose needs are greater than average? Do those who eventually move from wanting "a perfectly-healthy baby" to loving a child with special needs ever harbor secret regrets? Do they end up feeling "cheated" by fate? How does parenting a child with special needs change you and/or your family?

    As usual, you bring some great food for thought to the table, Elizabeth. Thanks again for always challenging our comfort zones and helping to peel away the blinders we can sometimes hid behind. :)

  23. INQUIRY

    in Looking to Adopt

    Posted

    Welcome to the forum, Pam. Amanda gave you some perfect advise in my opinion. Learn about the open adoption process and experience by reading the forum and recommended readings that you will find listed in the forum and from your friends who have adopted through Abrazo. Do some soul searching and challenge self regarding resolution of infertility issues, what you are open to in regards to adoption situations you would accept. Research who does homestudies in your area.

    The basic, abreviated process is: Inquiry, Application, Orientation weekend, homestudy, more paperwork, initial fees, create a profile, talk to potential birthparents, share process with your forum friends, birthparent chooses you, you recieve a case assessment that includes estimated expenses and other info, choose to match with potential birthparent, continue to develop relationship with potential birthparent, take placement of child beyond 48 hours after delivery after relinquishment is completed, spend more time with birthparent, raise your child in an open adoption relationship, monthly reports to Abrazo until finalization and quarterly homestudy updates, adoption finalized 6-12 months after placement, continue in open adoption relationship, annual reports to Abrazo.

    While this list has the "tasks" involved, it really doesn't capture the emotional ride you are considering entering into (even beyond the one involved through fertility treatments). The forum would better capture that side of things.

  24. Nursery Notes

    in Looking to Adopt

    Posted

    Contnuing to lift up this Mother and her baby and praying for a family to welcome them both.....

    Abrazo is seeking a family with lots of faith and high risk tolerance for a case with high health risks-- someone who is truly able to embrace the concept about "hating the sin but loving the sinner."

    It involves a loveable, troubled, Anglo birthmother in her twenties, who is herself an adoptee from one of Fort Worth's most prestigious agencies, and who has placed a newborn for adoption here previously.

    She is a bright, funny young lady with enormous potential, but has a history of drug use and has resorted to prostitution to support herself. The baby's father and his race are, therefore, unknown.

    She is HIV+ and has hepatitis C; whether or not the baby she is carrying will ultimately bear these diagnoses will not be known until long after birth, when the mother's antibodies have been shed from the baby's system.

    Due to this mother's legal problems, parenting is not an option and she is aware of this. However, she is going to need to reside in agency housing for several months prior to the birth, so living expenses on this case will be considerable (Medicaid should cover anticipated medical costs.)

    She is due in July, and her attorney contacted our agency to request our assistance with placement-planning, as she cannot be released from jail without a suitable housing plan in place.

    If you or someone you know feels called to respond to this baby and this birthmother in this hour of need, please contact Angela Martinez, MSW at 210/342-5683, as soon as possible. Thanks!

    I was just wondering if you ever heard what happened in this birthmother's situation. :)

  25. APPLICATION

    in Looking to Adopt

    Posted

    Welcome Danette & Chris! I think getting the homestudy started and possibly even complete prior to orientation is worth it. It can make you available to recieve those potential birthparent calls sooner and there is plenty of other things to do after orientation - like get a nursery ready! :D If you decide to get the homestudy started, make sure that the homestudy worker that you use knows Texas adoption requirements and that they know what Abrazo wants in their homestudies. The Abrazo gals can probably recommend homestudy workers in your area that they have worked with before.

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