Jump to content

suebee

Abrazo's Elite
 View Profile  See their activity

  • Posts

    6,599

  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won

    20

 Content Type 

Posts posted by suebee

  3. Speaking of "real parents"

    in Looking to Adopt

    Posted

    I remember as a child, I would tell my mom rather frequently that I was going to go live with my grandmother (her mom) when things were not going my way. One summer, they took me to visit her for two weeks, and I never said that again. :) I loved my Mema, but I missed my family terribly (and got quite bored with no other kids around...even if I didn't have to put up with a bossy older brother and a pesky little sister!)

    As I got older, I joked with my mom that she left me there so long on purpose. She insists that it was just the way things worked out, but I still wonder if it was intentional!

    Joshua has never said he wanted to live with his birthmom/dad, but he did go through a spell where he said he wanted to run away. (I totally understand. I sometimes feel that way!) I just told him that was fine, but he had to take me with him. :)

    • Upvote 1

  4. Selecting the right family for your baby

    in Considering Adoption?

    Posted

    One thing I am realizing from everybody's words is the importance of just being yourself-- of course, being sensitive and loving, but not trying to be exactly what you think a BP might be looking for in terms of personality, interests, sense of humor, etc. I would think that the best, most comfortable, and most durable match would come from the most honest depiction of your life in your profile book and in your phone conversations with potential BP's. And I love what was said earlier in the topic about not being in a hurry, being sure to commit everything to prayer, and trusting in God, just as we must do with all the unknowns in our lives. Great reminders.

    You are exactly right Grace! I remember when I was dating (a loooong time ago) thinking that I would just be myself so as to attract the person who would want to be with the real me. If I was pretending to be someone I wasn't and attracted someone, then I'd have to keep that "pretense" up! I think it's the same with a birthparent match. There are so many different things a potential birthparent is looking for and so many different adoptive parents that there really is not "one size fits all."

    Mandi, as always, thanks for sharing your perspective! You give us APs and future APs some really great insight! :)

  8. Honoring Birth Siblings

    in BirthGrandparents & Important Others

    Posted

    Well, I unexpectantly teared up when I introduced Joshua to Jerrod and Mikayla. We met at Magic Springs in AR, and I was on the phone with their mom trying to get her to where we were in the park, so I saw them first. I think it was the sweet look on Jerrod and Mikayla's face when they saw Joshua that made me so emotional. They have not always known about Joshua, but they have totally accepted him.

    All were a little shy at first. Joshua naturally is when he first meets people. Apparently they have that in common! But an amusement/water park was a great place for them to meet at this age, because it gave them a chance to relax and just enjoy hanging out together. For those who know Lydia, you know she was also a great icebreaker! She rarely meets a stranger.

    Their mom told me they were all nervous about meeting us. Joshua said he wasn't nervous, which I believe. He was extremely excited and very glad they got to meet. (They had only sent letters and texted before this weekend.) Joshua truly is a kid that feels like the bigger his family, the better. He has so many people who love him, and what we say at Abrazo is true, "You can never have too much love."

    I think Joshua definitely favors both Jerrod and Mikayla...probably Mikayla more. I'll try to post a picture later. Jerrod is in band, and Joshua is going to be in band when he starts Middle School in the fall. He wants to play drums, but I would love it if he plays the trumpet like Jerrod. Both love to watch/play football although they disagree on their favorite teams! :) Jerrod is very loving to his sister, and I definitely see those traits in Joshua. Of course, they have their moments, and Jerrod and Mikayla's mom assured me they have theirs as well!

    I honestly could not have asked for the weekend to go better. My main concern was that Joshua would have fun, and that J and M would be sweet to him. They definitely were. And they are great kids!

    • Upvote 1

  9. Honoring Birth Siblings

    in BirthGrandparents & Important Others

    Posted

    You're not prying at all. Joshua knew about her (age 12) and her brother (age 14), but they did not know about him until recently. I will fill you in at the picnic.

    This past weekend, we had the awesome experience of meeting Joshua's brother and sister (on his birthfather's side) and their mom. (They are now 15 and 13). They are such great kids, and we had a wonderful time meeting at Hot Springs, AR. We went to Magic Springs/Crystal Falls, ate lots of good food, played miniature golf, and explored historic Hot Springs together. We all agreed that it was just the beginning of many more fun times we hope to spend together.

    • Upvote 2

  15. The Adoption Tax Credit

    in Looking to Adopt

    Posted

    From another site...

    The extension of the Bush Tax cuts extended the credit until December 31, 2012, but with the following modifications:

    A. The amount for 2012 will be $12,170/child.

    B. The tax credit will not be refundable. This means to get the full refund, you must owe at least $12,170 in taxes.

    Hope this is helpful.

    Hmmmm...."B" sounds like the way it was before 2011, but I wonder if you will be able to carry over the credit to the next year(s) if you do not owe at least $12,170. In the past you could, but last year they made the tax refundable, which opened up a HUGE can of worms. And made it very difficult to get your refund. We filed in January and did not get a refund until July (and we were just using the last bit of credit from 2008 finalization of our daughter's adoption). Had to send in proof of adoption and proof of expenses, which we did, but it still wasn't until a taxpayer advocate got involved that we were able to finally get our refund.

    My advice...send what they ask for--verification of adoption (final adoption decree with judge's seal) and verification of expenses (we sent copies of canceled checks) and make extra copies of everything you send because you may have to send it again!

×
×
  • Create New...