[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Wow…I have like a trillion misspells on this latest addition… I better quit typing at night when I am tired..

Sorry about that..

If I can get the computer guru to deleted it I will repost with corrections..I had tired to correct after I reread it several times, but seems like you don’t have much time with the edit mode..

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

I love the picture you posted...very cute!

Thank you...and thank you also to all who support and embrace my child..

blessings

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Thank you, we are all so proud of her, she has done all the hard work herself though, I just give the hugs, kisses, lend the shoulder, an ear, help her stay focused on her goals, give her another perspective when needed and love her unconditionally. Oh yeah, and dished out the consequences and punishments when needed.

She has been on an amazing and at times quite difficult journey, but she continues being very optimistic about life and realistic about her educational career plans. She views things from a different perspective then many, and we know it is due to her stronger faith, courage and bumps her journey has encountered. She has not only touched, but has inspired so many lives. This was evident and almost overwhelming to her dad and I on her graduation night, the positive, loving, genuine admiration, sentiments and comments shared with us by her teachers, counselors, school administrators and many of her peers was amazing. She continued to share her faith and positive outlook when she delivered her invocation on behalf of all the graduates.

I am also a very proud grandma…my angel girl was wonderful and the PERFECT ANGEL, if I do say so myself, keeping her grandpa entertained as well as taking in everything around her, she was certainly the other inspiration (celebrity) for many. Can’t even count how many people looked forward to and enjoyed meeting this little gem. We were blessed to have our angel girl, her mom and dad at this milestone and special occasion; we certainly know they are proud of her and her accomplishments. It certainly allows all of us to see the traits, strength, determination, feistiness and courage that no doubt my daughter has passed on to her off spring. Family is everything to us, even our friends there, they are all part of our family, my husband and I could not have asked for a more perfect night for our daughter.

When I think of my daughter, I think of the words in the chorus of the song The Words I Would Say

Be strong in the Lord

And never give up hope

You're gonna do great things

I already know God's got His hand on You

So don't live life in fear

Forgive and forget

But don't forget why you're here

Take your time and pray

These are the words I would say

Blessings,

Mari

TURNING THE TIDE ** When everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hold on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.—Harriet Beecher Stowe

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Ladies thank you very much for your kind words and wishes...BTW you all have such beautiful children.

I am glad you liked the poem,I have enjoyed it for years. It is such a beautiful one that says so much. Suzi, LOL,,I am glad it was timely for you, well have to keep you in mind for the future..

I do hope all had a wonderful Mother's Day..

My daughter and I really enjoyed our retreat on Saturday and met some great women... But nothing tops our Mother's Day, we had an absolutely wonderful one that was more then we could have hoped for.. We had the blessed opportunity to spend part of the day with my granddaughter and her parents..I know my husband and I were on cloud nine, but our daughter we think was on cloud trillion. I couldn't have asked for a better gift for my daughter,what a thoughtful gesture and gift she received, we all received. After all the health issues my daughter has been dealing with, this certainly made her day. Have added a few pics and I think the faces say more then my words can.. We are looking forward to seeing them all again in a couple of weeks for my daughter's graduation.

Blessings to all

Mari

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Even though daily, I keep all first mothers and grandmothers and their families, in my thoughts, heart and prayers. I am sending out special prayers for each first mother and grandmother on Mother’s Day. Hope you have something special planned to pamper yourselves physically, mentally and/or spiritually.

My daughter and I will be out of town on Saturday attending a mother/daughter retreat. We are both looking forward to this event and our time away from the everyday comings and goings. Happy Mother’s Day to all Mothers, Our blessings to one and all..Love, Mari

I said a prayer for you today

And know God must have heard.

I felt the answer in my heart

Although He spoke no word.

I didn't ask for wealth or fame

I knew you wouldn't mind,

I asked Him to send treasures

Of a far more lasting kind.

I asked that He'd be near you

At the start of each new day

To grant you health & blessings

And friends to share your way.

I asked for happiness for you

In all things great & small.

But it was for His loving care

I prayed for most of all. Unknown Author

Dear God,

We thank you for taking us into your family through the miracle of

your grace. Today, loving God, we pray for mothers:

• who cared for us when we were helpless

• who comforted us when we were hurt

• who love us unconditionally

• whose love and care we often took for granted

Today we pray for:

• those who are grieving the loss of their mother

• all first mothers

• mothers grieving the loss of their child

• all adopted mothers who unselfishly share their child

• families separated by war or conflict

• Lord, give them special blessings

Gracious God, continue to keep us united with you and with each other, so that we can be and become all that we are meant to be. Amen.

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

GRAY MATTERS

May is Brain Tumor Awarness Month

Our brain controls many of the complex activities that we perform on a daily basis. Unfortunately sometimes the first time that we think about these "how to" steps is when we encounter difficulty performing the tasks. When someone we love is affect by the effects of a brain tumor, we want to do everything we can to help. The recovery is at times very stressful for the surviors, dealing with relearning simple task and just trying to do everyday activities can at times be challenging, this can take its toll on many. Sometimes, even for the caregiver, the demands of caregiving combined with the ongoing stress of everyday life can seem like a lot to cope with all at once. There are many from children, to the elderly that are affected. The road can sometimes seem long, continuing and taking one day at a time may be all we can do, what better way to help then by including them in our prayers, wherever these families may be. Reach out and touch someone with your prayer this month.

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

May is Brain Tumor Awarness Month

Our brain controls many of the complex activities that we perform on a daily basis. Unfortunately sometimes the first time that we think about these "how to" steps is when we encounter difficulty performing the tasks. When someone we love is affect by the effects of a brain tumor, we want to do everything we can to help. The recovery is at times very stressful for the surviors, dealing with relearning simple task and just trying to do everyday activities can at times be challenging, this can take its toll on many. Sometimes, even for the caregiver, the demands of caregiving combined with the ongoing stress of everyday life can seem like a lot to cope with all at once. There are many from children, to the elderly that are affected. The road can sometimes seem long, continuing and taking one day at a time may be all we can do, what better way to help then by including them in our prayers, wherever these families may be. Reach out and touch someone with your prayer this month.

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Jocelyn, Heidi, Amy,

you ladies ROCK...thank you so much

URGENT!!!!

Wanted to share the following with all and pass on info asap.... it was forwarded to me by a reliable friend,,,it sure does have all kinds of info..in some cases there were even phone numbers... It only lets you delete two or three entries per email address..it is easy to delete your info,,,just follow instructs... Please feel free to pass on to family and friends and help them protect their privacy.. Hope you find this helpful

Blessings,

Mari

There is a site called www.spokeo.com It's an online phone book that pictures of you and family members and your home, profession, your age, materitail status, how many people are living in your house and the ages of your children, credit score and so much more. Go there and do a search and see if your name is listed. To remove yourself click on Privacy button on the bottom right. Just do what it says to remove your profile. Also do a search for everyone in your house for their profile to delete it.

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Thanks for sharing Mari- you must be so proud of your daughters' accomplishments

Thank you Heidi…Your right, extremely proud of her… You would have thought she won the Pulitzer prize.. She has worked so hard, given her challenges and the last almost two years she’s had, it makes this milestone that much more meaningful for us..

Thank you also to all who have congratulated her..It is not only heart warming but comforting that so many are joining us (her family) and cheering her on..

I know I have slacked off on posting.. things have just been really tough, here I had thought that a year and a half later it would all be easier to deal with, but I found out much too soon that they are not, so I am not going to say that I haven’t had time, it’s more that I haven’t wanted to or been able to continue at this point.. With every doctors appointment I take my daughter too, every time something else pops up with her health due to the brain tumor, just continues to bring all of the scary frightening feelings back up and it feels like it was yesterday.. I really look forward to finally having to stop adding new doctors, new specialist to her extremely long list and her being healthy again in all aspects. Don’t get me wrong, I thank God for her daily, he and I continue to have numerous conversations daily, and he keeps sending me reassuring signs that we are on the right track.. It is just the human side of me that has trouble wrapping my arms, head and heart around it at times..I do feel confident that I will eventually make it there, of course hoping for it to be sooner then later.

Blessings to all,

Mari

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Hello Forum Family...Hope all are doing well...

Just want to wish each of you and yours a wonderful, blessed and safe Easter....

Blessings,

Mari

HEAVEN’S GROCERY STORE

I was walking down life’s highway a long tme ago.

One day I saw a sign that read…”HEAVEN’S GROCERY STORE.”

As I got a little closer the door came open wide…

And when I came to myself, I was standing right inside.

I saw a host of angels…they were standing everywhere.

Once handed me a basket and said, “My child, shop with care.”

Everything a Christian needed was in that grocery store.

And all you couldn’t carry, you could come back for more.

First I got some PATIENCE. LOVE was in the same row.

Further down was UNDERSTANDING…you need that everywhere you go.

I got a box of WISDOM, A bag or two of FAITH.

I just couldn’t miss the HOLY GHOST, for it was all over the place.

I stopped to get some STRENGHT and COURAGE to help me run the race.

By then my basket was getting full when I remembered I needed some GRACE.

I didn’t forget SALVATION….for salvation that was free.

So I tried to get enough of that to save both you and me.

Then I started to the counter to pay my grocery bill,

As I thought I had everythng to do my Master’s will.

When I went up the aisle, I saw PRAYER and I just had to put that in,

For I knew when I stepped outside…I would run right into sin.

PEACE and JOY were plentiful. They were on the last shelf.

SONGS OF PRAISES were hanging near, so I just helped myself.

Then I said to the angel…”Now how much do I owe?”

He just smiled and said, “Just take them everywhere you go.”

Again I smiled at him and said…”How much do I really owe?”

He smiled again and said, “My child, Jesus paid for your bill a long time ago.”

Author Unknown

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Continuation….Part 37

When my husband walked back in he told me my friend J was out in the waiting room wanting to see me, I wondered out loud how she knew we were there, then he shared with me, that the mother of one of my daughter’s classmates had gone by the night before, I hadn’t seen her, she happened to come by when my sister in law and I had gone to the food court before she left for the night, and when I got back into my daughter’s room, the only person there was her dad and visiting hours were over. I personally didn’t know her, or her son, my husband was the one who knew this mom, they worked as volunteers for a project at the school my daughter use to attend and even though my daughter was not attending that school currently, he was still very involved with this project. Apparently this mother had gone to see my daughter’s friend O, but found that she had been released from the hospital already so she went to see my daughter while there, after which she was going to the house of my daughter’s friend to see her. It occurred to me that was probably the reason for the call from my friend J the night before; this mother probably told them about my daughter. When I shared that thought with my husband, he said he hadn’t thought of that, and didn’t think to mention to me the visit. Tish, I now felt a little worse for not taking her call, I was sure she was concerned about my daughter. Had I known though about the previous nights visit I could have expected her call and yes even her visit.. I knew I would have done the same, well what was I thinking, I had done the same when my daughter and I found out about her friend the previous year, and we were there every single day visiting her until they released her from the hospital several months later. I braced myself and went out to see her.. As soon as I saw her she asked me how I was doing, didn’t wait for a reply, she apologized for not being there sooner, but she had only learned of my daughter’s situation the night before…and as I had figured, it had been my daughter’s classmate’s mother who had been there. After we cried together, I caught her up on my daughter’s situation, and we talked about the irony of two friends who were dealing with life threatening experiences within a year of each other.. She shared with me that the previous Sunday she had seen my jeep in the parking lot, and thought we were there to see O, but when she got to her daughter’s room and she hadn’t mentioned we were there, she thought maybe we were there visiting someone else.. We hadn’t been to the hospital since O had returned for her bone marrow transplant due to her immune system and blood counts needing to stabilize, even though we were some of only a very small group of none family members who could visit her.. We just didn’t want to take a chance with her and expose her to any illness that would put her life at greater risk. So we were waiting for her to be released from the hospital to go see her. I told her that I would have really preferred her not finding out, only because she had enough on her plate with her daughter’s situation, but I had thought of her often while there. I was glad thought that O’s health had finally improved enough to be able to go home, O wanted to see my daughter, but she could not freely walk the hospital corridors yet, her platelets were still too low, she could only go as far as the clinic to get her treatments three times a week and still could not have too many visitors. I needed to get back to my daughter’s room, I felt sort of anxious and uncomfortably not being there, especially in the state she was in. So when I told J that I appreciated her coming by, as well as her prays and concern, she asked if she could see my daughter before she left, her husband was with her daughter who was getting a treatment down the street, I told her she was sedated but she could go in to see her, I tried once more to paint a picture of how she looked to give a little heads up.. I asked her to tell O that my daughter was doing good, no need or sense in her being concerned with my daughter, she needed to focus on getting well and stronger herself.

After J left, I sat there and thought about what we talked about, two teen girls who had become friends when they met their freshmen year…They were each other’s date to their first homecoming dance (neither were allowed to go with a boy yet). They both played volleyball and golf, she usually went with us when we went to tournaments, practices or other functions away from the school, including out of town football games, and it was as if we had acquired another daughter. O, was looking forward to being in my daughter’s quince the year before, they had been practicing for it the day before she ended up in the ER..She kept trying to talk her doctors into letting her out of the hospital so she could be part of the celebration, and of course that wasn’t going to happen, but no one could say she didn’t try. We did make arrangements with her parents and doctors permission for my daughter and her court of honor to stop by the hospital on their way from the church to the reception hall to see her. Once O was able to return to school, my daughter was her protector, watched over her like a mother hen, the dean of women called my daughter her friend’s guardian angel. Little did we know at the beginning of their high school years that they would both be dealing with life threatening situations before they had graduated, what were the chances?

My daughter pretty much slept (a better way for me to look at it) well into the late afternoon; her vitals were finally looking better and were staying stable. She still seemed to be more out of it then not during the short times she was awake. Even though she seemed to be resting more than being in the comatose state (as the nurse and doctor had described it) she had been in that morning, I was still too worried and filled with the anxiety of not fully understanding or rather knowing what might come next, we knew her situation was crucial, it had been an unforeseen set back, I prayed a small set back, but it was a setback not less and I was not about to leave the immediate area for any length of time. I knew there was nothing I could do to make her better, I couldn’t snap my fingers or wave some magic wand over her and make all this go away, though at that time I sure wish it was possible and I could have pulled out some special love filled angel dust to use, but all I could do was continue to leave it in God’s hands, continue to ask him to keep her wrapped in his loving arms and to protect her and her child, after all he had gotten both of them this far, I knew he would continue to embrace them.

Her neuro doctor came by during his afternoon rounds to check on her, advised us that after the CTS the following morning he would decide whether to remove her ventriculostomy tubing that had been inserted in her head that previous Friday, but only if the fluid was still draining properly. Depending on how she was doing he was also going to have someone from physical therapy and a speech therapist come see her and work with her, he would get the nurse to contact them and schedule. Her OB also came by to see her; she had already been brought up to date by my daughter’s neuro doctor of what had transpired that day. Nurses from maternity floor where still coming in daily to monitor the baby’s heartbeat, we had made sure that when they took her for her CTs, and when they had come to her room for x-rays they knew she was pregnant so they could take the necessary precautions…

Family started coming by in the evening, not staying long, they all just wanted to see how she was doing and to check on my husband and I. Everyone kept trying to get us to go eat something, or just go take a break, but neither of us were moving from there for now. One of my friends was going to bring us dinner, she would call us when she got there so my husband could meet her out in the waiting room, so we were pretty much set until he had to go let my daughter’s dogs out and feed them. Friends that called were still told that we would call them when she was up to having company outside of the family. Several religious sisters, one from our church, and two from her school came by to give her blessings, we were not going to turn them away… They were Gods angels, yes as we all are, but to me though, they had more of a direct line to him then me and with closer ties, we would take all the blessings and help we could get. Meanwhile we continued to wait, I sure wish I could say waiting became easier, but it really didn’t, it took so much work and was emotionally draining just to sit there and not be able to do anything for her.

To be continued……

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Continuation…Part 36

It didn’t take long for Nurse Elizabeth to come back in with a bag which was a steroid...the lab was called and not long after another bag of drip was added, this time it was potassium. She had been on both after surgery and they had been removed earlier that morning when the bags were finished, but a few hours later it look like she was having some type of withdrawal/reaction to not having them, so the doctor ordered them back for her. He was on his way back in to check on her. My daughter was pretty much out of it, they had also given her morphine which pretty much knocked her out.

As we waited for the doctor and talked with Elizabeth, we found out that she was not due to be on duty, it was supposed to be her day off, but the nurse that was scheduled had been in a slight fender bender that morning, due to rain we had been getting all night and into the morning hours. All we could say was thank goodness she had been there, God was truly looking out for my little girl. I waited for her doctor to check her out before I called my daughter, she had already called, but I had told her the doctor was there and I would call her back, even though at the time of her call he wasn’t there yet, but I wanted to make sure we knew what was going on before I spoke with her.

Once the doctor came in and checked her, he asked Elizabeth to increase the steroid drip and gave her some other instructions that only they understood, but it had something to do with stabilizing her vitals, there had been drops in her heart rate then it would go extremely high, so keeping her as quiet and still as possible was necessary. Currently that didn’t seem to be a problem, due to her being pretty much out of it, but it would be important as the other medications started to work and her body started to respond to the meds and regained strength. Every morning lab techs came in to take blood, labs were done on her daily, prior to surgery they took the blood from her arm, after surgery they took it from a port-a-cath that had been inserted in the left side of her chest, and because he didn’t want her moved, he asked Nurse Elizabeth to have radiology come in and do some x-rays, instead of the normal process of unhooking her from the big monitors and hooking her up to portable ones to take her to radiology. He would be back later, but they knew to call him if there was a need. Though we knew she was well taken care of, she was in good hands and all precautionary measures were being taken, it was still nerve racking to watch this unfold and feel utterly helpless, all we could do was wait, wait on the latest test, wait on the findings of the tumor from the Mayo Clinic, wait to see if she was going to need chemo or radiation treatments, wait for her vitals to stabilize, JUST WAIT…….

When I finally did call her sister back, I told her that she was asleep when she asked to speak to her, I told her she had not had a good morning and was resting, but I assured her she was doing better, a short while after we got off the phone, she called me back to tell me she was going to make arrangements to fly in the next morning. …No need for me to try and talk her out of it, I knew it was something she needed to do, it was important for her and I knew her sister would love to see her. I just asked her to call me once she had her flight scheduled so I could make arrangements to have her picked up at the airport.

As my husband and I sat there doing the only thing we could do, keep vigil, I told him that I had several calls from the night before; one was from my friend J, the mom of my daughter’s friend who has leukemia. Her call had come in around 11 pm, but I just wasn’t’ up to talking to anyone outside the family at the time, so I decided not to take the call, I would call her the next day.. I felt bad, because I had always told her to call me when she needed to talk, I couldn’t imagine what she was going through with her daughter’s illness, and if being there and lending an ear when she needed to talk was how I could help her deal with the situation then that’s how I was willing to help her. Sometimes she would call me around midnight if she had been having a hard day and couldn’t sleep, I would stay on the phone with her until the early hours of the morning. I hoped her daughter was doing ok, she had been in remission for about a year, but the cancer had returned just a month prior and she had to have a bone marrow transplant a couple of weeks before my daughter’s ER visit…but right then and there when the call came in, I just couldn’t focus on anything outside of my daughter, I hoped it didn’t make me a bad friend or selfish person, I just couldn’t’ take on someone else’s grief at the time, and I didn’t know if I could remain calm enough not to tell her about my daughter, she also had enough to deal with at the time. My husband asked me if I was going to call her back, I told him she was probably at work, I would call her that evening..

Though my husband (originally before the episode with my daughter) was going to go get some breakfast, we were both no longer hungry..I guess both of our insides were a jumble of nerves that had stamped out any appetite we may have had. We were good though, had tons of snacks, that my mom, sister, and SIL had been bringing, I just needed something to drink, so he had gone out to get me some orange juice, of course something stronger probably could have done me some good to settle my nerves, could probably have been able to handle a stiff drink like a Starbucks Coffee, but juice would have to do. Received call from my daughter with flight info…told her I would make sure someone was there to meet her and that she would be staying at her grama’s, so she wouldn’t stay at the house by herself.

To be continued……

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

I don’t think I did anything that another mother wouldn’t have done for her daughter in the same situation I would hope. I just did the mom thing which is to continue to try and take care of my daughter, since I knew I couldn’t take her sadness away, I just tried to add something pleasant to the mix.

I thought it was important to be able to balance the VERY IMPORTANT DAY, which I knew would be sad for her, with something that would be a little fun to do and give her some new memories…Now she can also remember her daughter’s first b-day with the first time she had a massage/facial at a spa… Had been thinking about different possibilities for over a month, finally deciding on our outing two weeks before, but didn’t tell her until the night before..So I am so glad it worked out for us (that she wanted to do it)…

I will always be there for you

I am your mom.

Someone to share the good times

As well as the bad.

I make no judgments by what you say

I just listen with my heart and

Hope to be of help in any way I can.

I will be there for you now and forever

And always please remember

I am your mom!

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Thank you for your kind words… Though my daughter was a little sad at times, over all we really had a good day…Her day actually couldn’t have started out any better than with the call we rec’d from my grandbaby’s mom, first thing in the morning…that was exciting…which really made my daughter (actually both of us) feel warm and glowing.. We had the chance to talk to our angel girl, twice actually.. We greatly appreciated the opportunity, what a beautiful gift we were given…

I also kept ourselves busy.. I took the day off of work, kept her out of school (I know, not a good example, sorry)… Hit the spa for a massage and facial, then went to a movie and dinner, just the two of us (not being selfish or anything,but her dad is out of town, otherwise I think he would have joined us for movie and dinner, don’t think he would have been too keen on spa)…It was a better day then we both expected…

Hope all have a wonderful and warm weekend…. Be safe and well…

Blessings,

Mari

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

As I reminisce on the day you were born

Along with your entrance, came a cold winter storm

The newspaper contained such depressing news, happening in the world

Little did they know, that day would be born, a beautiful baby girl

A headline read: Gray day in S.A

But a miracle happened, on that cold winter day

Though seven weeks early, doctors could no longer wait

On pins and needles, we prayed & we waited, to learn your fate

And all of sudden, here we are, one year later

Our love for you, expands our hearts so much greater

Even though with you, on this day we cannot be

You’re not far from our thoughts & our hearts, please believe

As we see pictures of you today, with sparkling eyes and smiles

We hope our immense love for you, reaches you across the miles

Your first year of life we will also celebrate

Never forgetting you made your entrance, on this forever special date

God answered our prayers from far above

To give you the strength to thrive, our beautiful angel, we will always love

With lots and lots of love, your grama

HAPPY FIRST BIRTHDAY OUR SWEET GIRL

FROM YOUR FIRST FAMILY, We love you so much...

May God continue to keep you safe and well...…

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Continuation….Part 35

As I expected my daughter’s call came in around 10:45 that night, I explained what had occurred to her little sister, and walked her through the events of the previous weeks, then spent another half hour reassuring her that her sister was doing well so far. Then I prepared myself for the emotional rollercoaster that my daughter was obviously going through as I heard her cry, the concern and fear in her voice on the other end of the phone, it took great inner strength to maintain my own composure, the last thing I wanted to do was frighten her even more if I became emotional, and I feared she would think her sister was not doing as well as I had told her. Once she had the opportunity to release many of her emotions, she seemed to be calmer and assured me that she had no plans in going into work, she was going back to bed, she needed me to assure her that if anything happened I would contact her immediately, and I promised I would. Once we were off the phone, my husband and I talked about the events of the day, we both sat next to my daughter’s bed and just watched her sleep. Once again we took turns keeping vigil, as I sat there I thought back to my oldest daughter so far away, I wondered if she was sleeping or laying awake thinking of her sister, I so wished I could have been able to hold her, offer some comfort with my arms around her and sooth her fears. I knew once she learned of what had happened, she was going to be terrified for her sister and feel that she should have been there for her sister and for me, after all__ this was so much more crucial and delicate then a few months prior when she learned her sister was pregnant and flew into town to be with her. I thought of how ironic, well not really sure if ironic is even the right word, of all that had happened within the last few months, the dips on this rollercoaster ride we were on kept getting steeper the turns somehow seemed more ferocious with these major life changing events that we had been through to this point. I prayed for strength and courage for all of us to continue to plow ahead, we couldn’t give up now; we couldn’t allow ourselves to get discouraged and lose our faith.

Before we knew it, it was five am, her vitals had been good during the night, they would be in shortly to check her again, she had already started to stir and I was anxious to see if the left side of her face had relaxed and returned to normal. I was also both anxious and hopeful, if that makes any sense, as to what this new day would bring; we waited for her doctor to come by. My daughter’s face was still not back to normal, but she was able to move her arm and leg a lot easier then she had previously. She wanted a mirror to see what she looked like, she didn’t seem to remember much of the previous day, I silently thank God for that, but she did have a lot of questions, especially after she saw the bag of spinal fluid which was still the reddish brown color that was still hooked up with the drip from her head. She didn’t seem to be alarmed when we explained that it was due to the surgery and some blood that was mixed with the fluid.. Within a few minutes she asked about it again, it seemed like every few minutes we were having the same conversations, her doctor explained that she would be experiencing short term memory loss, the paralyzes on the left side of her face, as well as numerous other side effects she was having would eventually clear up, they were all temporary. Over all she was in good spirits, seemed calm and relaxed, her dad and I took turns quizzing her on events and people, though it was still somewhat a bit alarming that she didn’t remember things, events or people, even though we knew why. Each time the nurses or the doctor came in they would check the strength of her legs and arms as well as her grip.. She has always been physically a pretty strong person, pretty solid, don’t know if that was due to her workouts and playing sports or if her strength made her the good athlete she was, but she had some awesome power in knocking those balls, whether in volleyball, basketball, softball, golf, or tennis from the time she was a tiny tot, so we knew it was only a matter of time that her strength would be back, of course as long as there was no nerve damage that prevented it.

Some of her aunts were going to stop by, as was my mom, I had asked my brother and sister not to bring my niece and nephew just yet, I wanted them to see her first. Both of her cousins are sensitive individuals and I was afraid they would be needlessly frightened at how they saw her. She had developed what seemed like a nervous twitch around her mouth and she kept biting the right side of her lower lip, her hair was also extremely matted with dry blood, I would let my sister and brother decide when the time was right for my nephew and niece to see their cousin.

We called her previous high school to get her previous years year book, we wanted her to have something that would help her with some of her memory blanks, she seemed to remember things from two years prior, but didn’t really talk much about more recent times, people or events, my sister in law would get it and bring to her, she also brought her a small photo album that contained pictures of my youngest niece and nephew, my daughter’s two pride and joys. We asked another one of her aunts if she could bring her a spiral notebook to keep a journal of the daily events. Her sister called and spoke with her for a while several times, but not long after she was off the phone she didn’t remember she had spoken to her much less the conversation, the same was true with her visitors, while they were there, she had normal conversations, but shortly after they left, she didn’t remember they were there, so keeping her journal became almost a life line for her. I had made the phone calls she wanted me to, and all were told that we would contact them when she was up for visitors outside of the family.

Five am Thursday morning they took her for a ct scan, she had awaken once more in a good mood, she had a slightly busy day Wednesday, but we vigilantly monitored who came to see her and how long they stayed, we limited visits to no more than ten to fifteen minutes and only one to two people at a time, with either her dad or I remaining in her room at all times, we made sure no one mentioned the brain tumor, she was still referring to it as “a blockage”, we also made sure that anyone who came to see her knew ahead of time what to expect when they saw and talked to her, well we tried to convey it as best we could, but__ some things just have to be seen for themselves.

They had been taking her vitals every two hours throughout the night and after her cts, her doctor made his morning rounds, her ob had also been coming by to see and check on her daily, she had breakfast was talkative, and then something changed, luckily she had nurse Elizabeth, the same nurse she had the day before and twice prior to surgery. We noticed that she had become pretty quiet and lethargic, Elizabeth watched her carefully and kept checking in on her every few minutes, my daughter was certainly different then she had been the day after surgery, Elizabeth kept asking her questions, her speech became sluggish, she couldn’t keep her eyes open for long and she started getting headaches, she was getting disoriented once more, I knew her nurse didn’t want to alarm us, but we could see she was concerned. It was barely eight am, and after we all tried unsuccessfully to keep my daughter awake for even five minutes, nurse Elizabeth said that something wasn’t right and walked out of her room straight for the phone and was calling the doctor.

to be continued......

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Hello everyone,

Thank you ladies so much for your kind words.. Elizabeth, glad you like the pics, hoping we can get by there in the near future to see them up.

Our family has been hanging on..this has been a difficult year to say the least, and the last several months have been a little tough, but we keep plugging along. Thank you also for the nice comments on the pics I added to my album, my girls are lovely if I do say so myself.

We had the opportunity to see my beautiful grandbaby in Oct and then again in Nov which was awesome..We are so grateful to have been given the opportunity to have the portraits done of my daughter and granddaughter, these certainly made the holiday season more bearable for my daughter, her dad and I.

My daughter had her follow up with her neurosurgeon in Nov and even though her EEG from Oct came back abnormal, she is still in remission, her doc weaned her off the anti seizure meds which she is happy about, but that made me a little nervous, hopefully she won’t have any more need for it, but we will have to wait and see. Her next MRI is scheduled for Feb, she also continues to take the meds the endocrinologist prescribed, there wasn’t much change in her lab work in Dec, and she was feeling a bit discouraged, but I reminded her she had only been taking the meds since mid Oct so to give it some time, the nurse advised that it may take up to six months to see improvement, hopefully when she goes back in Feb. there will be at least a little so she can get at least some encouragement.

Trusting all of you had a good start to the New Year and that God has many blessings in store for the remainder. Once again thank you..

blessings,

Mari

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Mari,

Trusting that your family is doing better & healing.

Just a note to say that I've missed loving post.

Come back when all is well.

xoxo, Amy

Thank you Amy... We are trugging along...Blessing to you and yours..

Wishing everyone a very Merry Christmas in the company of all your loved ones...And thinking of all who need special prayers during this holiday season, holding you in my thoughts, prayers and heart..

Thank You, Lord, for Your healing love. We ask You this holy night to please heal us, in our hearts, wherever we are lonely, empty, fearful, proud, or resentful. Heal this brokenness in us, dear Jesus. Give us Your deep inner peace that we might impart joy, hope, and courage to all whom we encounter.

This Christmas, dear Lord, please open our hearts to see You more clearly, to receive You more deeply, and to follow You more willingly. Increase our ability to give Your love to others, and to receive Your love from others. May this Christmas Day warm our hearts all year, and only increase. Thank You for coming to us, Lord Jesus.

Amen

blessings,

Mari

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Thank you for the B-day wishes... Paula, Heidi same to you my fellow November b-days and anyone else I may have missed..

Wishing everyone a wonderful and blessed Thanksgiving in the company of your family and friends.

Sending special prayers to ALL BIRTHFAMILIES everywhere, may you find yourself surrounded by an abundance of family and friends who will embrace you with warmth and love to help ease the void in your life during this holiday season.

The Ship of Life

Dear Lord, steer the ship of my life to your quiet harbor, where I can be safe from the storms of conflict, show me the course I should take.

Renew in me the gift of discernment, so that I can see the right direction in which I should go to find much needed solace. Give me the strength and the courage to choose the right course, even when the sea is rough and the waves are high. Knowing that through enduring hardship and danger, in your name I shall find comfort and peace. Amen

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Hello forum family,

Just a short update….my daughter and I are doing well, most of the time…..

She had her appt. w/endro and after a slew of test, we rec’d diagnosis at her follow up a few days ago.. Doc was looking at three possible reasons for her symptoms/health concerns; it was one of the three. Unfortunately she has been put on meds that have some not so pleasant side effects.. It is sort of strange, out the three possibilities one really had us concerned, thank goodness it wasn’t that one, though none were very good, so even though what she has seems to have some sever repercussions in the future if not taken care of, it seemed to be better then the other possibilities. I am still doing research on what she has been diag with to better educate both she and I, the good thing or bad thing (glass half full or have empty) is that we are finding out this seems to be a very common thing, so lots of info out there.

We continue to travel new territories; sometimes I picture this road we are on like the ground after an earthquake, with cracks that spider out in all directions…Staying positive and looking at the brighter side, has no doubt been a challenge this last year, but we can not, I can not allow either one of us to give up or let everything thrown at her/us to beat us down, there are so many more positive things in the world for her, for us that outweigh the negatives, sometimes we just need to keep reminding ourselves.

Good news though, she has remained focused on her studies, has earned another credit in the last few weeks, she is close to earning one more, which she should get in the next couple of weeks, then will have one more to go to finish her senior year.. She is slated to take her ACT later this month. I think this focus has also helped keep her sane sometimes..

Your prayers for her continued courage and strength physically, spiritually and emotional greatly appreciated and needed..

Dyna, congrats on your ACTS journey, my daughter also has hers, attended her first retreat in 07 and was part of a team in 08…

Blessings to one and all,

Mari

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Continuation….Part 34

When her dad got there, she was asleep again, he sort of tip toed to me and whispered if it was still ok for him to be there, I had to laugh at his expression. I told him it was and for him to be prepared, it would probably be my turn soon. He looked at me and his look was a perplexed one, so while my daughter was asleep, I took the opportunity to fill him in on all that had/was happening, and for him to be careful on how he responded to her, for him to be very cautious she might all of sudden wake up and be angry and no telling whose turn would be next to get blasted, I tried to prepare him as best I could, but it really would be something that he would have to experience to fully understand what I was talking about. I told him she was paralyzed on her left side, though it was temporary, and that her nurse Angela would be there at all times. I waited for her to wake up before I left to go outside for a little while to warm up and eat. She seemed to be in a good mood, but I was still worried, told her dad to call me if I needed to come back up.

While I was outside I called and left messages on phones of four of her friends, then called family to update them. I called my son in law and updated him, my daughter was asleep she had worked over night, but he had already arranged for her to take the night off and he would tell her when she got up. I prepared myself for the call I was going to get from her as soon as she learned what was happening with her little sister. I wasn’t’ looking forward to that call though, I knew she was going to be worried for her sister and upset that she wasn’t there for her or me and yeap, even mad that I hadn’t told her sooner.

As soon as I ate and made those calls I went right back up to her room, as I walked through the doors of the NCCU, my husband was standing outside of my daughter’s room and her room was filled with nurses and one of the doctors, I froze, my first thought was fear for her life, my heart sank like a boulder to the pit of my stomach, what had happened, she was fine when I left her. As I found my senses I rushed up, my husband saw me and grabbed my arms, told me “she’s ok, she’s ok, she had a seizure, the nurses responded quickly, they contacted her doctor right away, they started her on seizure medication, they are now getting her stable”..I just stood there not knowing what I was feeling, thinking, or needing to do, the helplessness and fear were pretty intense, but we could do nothing but wait. I had only been gone half an hour if not less and this happened, I asked him when it happened and he said about fifteen minutes after I had left, he hadn’t called me, he didn’t want to scare me and said everything had happened so quick, he had to leave her room when the medical staff came in to take care of her..Thoughts running through my mind were pretty much out there, was she ok, did this cause any damage or could it, was this something she would have for life, how soon before it was going to happen again, how would this affect her recovery, how would we deal with it if it happened at home? I felt myself trembling and felt the hot tears well up in my eyes, just thinking one more thing for her to have to deal with, but she had her life, we still had her here, we could handle this, we had come this far, God wouldn’t take her from us now.

It seemed like we had been waiting a long time before the doctor finally came out to talk to us, said that they are never sure if a seizure will occur, so they don’t put them on medicine right after surgery so they can monitor, they usually hope it doesn’t happen, but if they had started her on the meds right away they wouldn’t know if she was going to have them or not. It was best to wait; they could be triggered by nerves that are cut during the surgery he said, she would require anti seizure medication which she had already been started on. Once it was all clear we were allowed to go back in, she started having what they called involuntary movement of her limbs on her left side, which scared the heck out of me, not knowing if this was the start of another seizure, but it was the paralysis that was disappearing gradually. A few hours later though, she could move her arm, leg and foot a little when they asked her to move them, there were areas where she still didn’t have sensation.

Her dad left for a while and I sat with her as she slept on and off the remainder of the day, she still was between confusion of things in the past and current time. At one point she was talking to her nurse about Wendy and how she had just walked by to the desk, nurse asked her where she was and she pointed out her glass window to a nurse at a desk directly in front of her room, Angela asked her which Wendy she was referring too, my daughter told her, “Wendy, you know the one from never never land”, “oh I see her” replied Angela and then she just winked at me. Angela told me that they did have a nurse Wendy who had been there earlier and I wondered out loud how my daughter would have known that, we both (nurse and I) figured that my daughter may have heard the name and somehow it made an impression on her and stayed in her mind. A little while later a friend of my husband’s walked in to check on her and ask for him, she told him he had left to let her dogs out and feed them, though that’s not where he had gone, he had been doing that since that previous Friday so it was more of a previous memory. He asked if we needed anything, we advised him that we didn’t and thank him for stopping in; we would let her dad know he had come by. The nurse asked my daughter who he was and she replied by giving her his name and who he was, she(nurse)looked at me for confirmation, I guess to see if my daughter did recognize him and knew who he was and I shook my head yes to confirm she had been given the correct info..Since this was all new to us, the whole thing was really a bizarre experience that would take some adjustments.

As far as we knew, the baby to this point thankfully was doing well; both my daughter and my granddaughter had survived the surgery. This would again, be a wait and see situation, of course we knew neither mother nor child were out of the woods by a long shot, so it was one day at a time for everyone. The anesthesiologist had come by in the late afternoon to check in on her as did her OB, a few hours later her surgeon made his round to check on her. The nurse’s report was good, vitals had pretty much remained stable since the seizure..She was still more groggy then not, but that was expected, after a good night sleep she would/should be more refreshed in the morning..

They still had the bag and tube draining fluid, though her doctor had made a larger secondary opening inside to allow the fluid to drain down her spine from her head to prevent the need for a shunt, the tube would remain until they were sure everything was working properly and to help the fluid drain a bit faster. It was strange to see that bag that in the days before was filled with clear fluid now had a dark reddish brown color to it; of course this was from the blood that was mixed in with the spinal fluid. These were all little things that seemed to magnified all that had happened, not that we were in denial, it just seemed to put in perspective what she had just gone through, how delicate and crucial her situation was, even now after the removal of the tumor that almost killed her, there seemed to be so much more ahead of us that we didn’t understand, we couldn’t understand, as her dad and I sat there with her, the conversations that we were having with her felt so strange, it all seemed so surreal.

Our deacon came by to see her and give her a blessing, she had a very normal conversation with him, he was there maybe five minutes, I walked him out and we talked for a little while, he gave me his cell number to keep him posted on her condition and recovery, by the time I walked back into my daughter’s room, she had already forgotten who had just been there and where I had gone, a little while later one of her dads good friends from high school that my daughter has known all her life, she calls him her uncle s also came by, again just a couple of minutes to check on her, this time her dad walked him out, and I realized that in less than five minutes when I asked her who had just visited her, she struggled to remember who had just been there, I had to give her several hints before she guessed who it was.

Nurse’s rotation was at seven, her new nurse came in to check vitals, and we were now at a point that the nurse no longer had to be in her room all the time, as far as we knew the most critical period after surgery was now behind us, though she would be coming in every half hour. Both my husband’s and my phone were pretty active with calls and text messages, though unless it was someone that I really needed to talk to (family), I let my calls go to voice mail, once my daughter fell asleep I would reply back. A couple hours later my son in law called, my daughter was in the shower and he was going to tell her as soon as she was out, she still thought she was going to work..Ugh, I felt my stomach tighten, told him that I was ready for her call (not really, I thought, but wanted to get it behind me) and reminded him to please be gentle with her when he told her, nothing left for me to do but wait for her call. My daughter seemed to be out for the night, other than when they would come in to check on her that she would wake up for a bit, but she wasn’t staying awake for long. Her dad had arranged for her brother to go by the house to feed and let the dogs out so he wouldn’t have to leave. We decided to once again take turns staying up with her, he would take the first shift, I tried to settle into the lounge chair to rest and try to relax a bit, replied to texts and closed my eyes for a while, and waited for my daughter to call me.

To be continued......

[LIGHT A CANDLE]

Lighting a candle in Thanksgiving for my beautiful grand baby as she turns eight months today.. May God continue to watch over you, keep you safe and healthy..

Love,

Grama Nana

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Hello forum family,

And thank you ladies for your thoughts and concerns for my baby girl... We are once again waiting on more lab work, and going through the process of elimination. Take her back to endro next week to get latest results, and then go from there. She has actually been taking the process pretty well, it has unfortunately or fortunately (depending on the type of day we are having) become a familiar routine..

We did start taking Zumba classes last week (3xs wk)...even though we started working out in May, 4 to 6 xs a wk...NOTHING prepared me for the aches and pains of muscles I had forgotten I had.. but I know it will be well worth it and really help to work out STRESSSSSSS once I can get past struggling to get out of bed after a workout… On the other hand my daughter to her true form has been a champ and is enjoying the challenge (or maybe more enjoying too much watching me suffer)….

Hope to continue with posting our journey soon...just been somewhat distracted...

May you all have a wonderful week

Blessings,

Mari

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Continuation…Part 33

We finally received the call we had eagerly been awaiting, my daughter was doing well, surgery was complete, doctor had already started closing her up and he would be out to talk to us as soon as he was done. I was so grateful that every time they called us the nurse started by telling us my daughter was doing well, even though I didn’t want to think that something could go wrong and that would be the next call, it was always there, in the back of my mind. We all gave thanks to God, and I could see the relief in everyone waiting with us. Now we waited for the doctor to come out, we still didn’t know nor were sure what would come next, would she be taken up or would she be kept there in recovery, would the tumor be malignant or benign, was he able to get it all and clear the passage for the fluid or did he have to insert a shunt, and the baby, was she ok, did she make it through. It was so noisy in my head, one step at a time, don’t get ahead of yourself and make yourself crazy, were things I kept trying to repeat to myself to stay calm and positive. Shortly before noon the doctor came out to talk to us, she was on her way up, they were taking her back to her room in the NCCU, he felt confident that he had gotten all the tumor out, part of the tumor had collapsed when he tried to remove it with the scope which would have been much less evasive then the full cut, but once part of it collapsed due to lack of blood supply he had no choice but to open her up. He told us how much hair he had to take which amounted to approx. a little less than three inches wide, the incision was eight inches long across the top of her head to above the ears, though he had thought at first he knew what type of tumor she might have, he found that the texture and coloring were different, he hadn’t seen one like hers and he didn’t want to guess, the tumor was being sent to the Mayo Clinic for biopsy and once he had the results of type of tumor it was, he would know if further treatment would be needed. For now we needed to wait on results. He said it would be a little while before we could see her, but we could go up to the waiting room of the NCCU and they would come and get us.

Our family moved up to the waiting room, my husband paced back and forth wanting to go see her, I sat with my mom and sister, trying to patiently wait, which was a tough task to accomplish. About a short time later the anesthesiologist came into the waiting room to see us, he went over the surgery as had her surgeon, he also told us that her surgeon was one of the best in his field and he had worked with him for twenty five years. She was in good hands he said, she did amazingly well, “she will be ok”, as soon as they had her settled in her room, a nurse would come and get us he assured us. I really hadn’t experienced an anesthesiologist follow up with the family after a surgery and spend as much time with us as he had, it was very comforting to know that he had taken the time. Once more on this leg of our journey, we were met with yet another compassionate doctor. I felt like God was truly embracing us with his robe and assuring us things were going to be ok by sending these special people into our lives.

There seems to be something there with some people, men really, who are part of the Catholic ACTS community, that I have noticed and encountered. The reason for this I should mention, or at least in my view, is that while we were waiting for my daughter to go into surgery and her anesthesiologist was talking to us, I noticed he was wearing the ACTS fishers of men bracelet, I glanced at my husband’s wrist and he was also wearing his. Both my husband and the doctor also noticed that they each were wearing them, after he (doctor) was done talking to us about the medication, he went over to my husband and shared some commentary about ACTS and they exchanged information about their perspective church communities, my husband asked him to take care of his little girl and the doctor assured him he would do just that. I am not saying that the doctor took better care of my daughter because of this, I am sure and it was obvious that he really cared about his patients, but I saw it as another one of God’s interventions, another sign he had sent our way.

My husband couldn’t wait, he went to check on her and a little later came out to get me, he told me my daughter was asking for me, he advised me that she was paralyze from her left side, but they had told him it was temporary. As I walked through the doors of the NCCU, we were met by a nurse, there were still several nurses and one of her doctors in her room, the nurse told me that my daughter was asking for me, and If I could go in first, as we walked she stopped me at the door and advised me that my daughter was very angry at her dad, and it would probably be better if he waited a while to see her, in order not to agitate her further. I was not sure why, how or what was going on, so I went in to see her. I was totally unprepared for what I saw and heard and it scared the heck out of me.. She was moving her right hand and reached for me, as she talked the left side of her face did not move and the nurse was touching her left arm and leg and asking if she could raise her limbs or felt the touches, she couldn’t do either. She seemed to be fully awake, but was talking about things that had happened a year to over three years prior, she was saying that she hated her father, he was mean, and when I asked her why, what had happened, I found that the anger she was expressing for him, was due to an argument/fight they had over a year before due to her boyfriend, but she was talking as if it had just happened. I just looked at her nurse, and I knew she could tell and sense that I was completely confused and worried; she assured me that it was normal for this type of surgery; it would take some time for the distortion in her mind to clear up. She was dozing off and on, I stepped out to tell my husband what was going on and asked him to tell our family that they would have to wait until the next day to see her; she was in no condition to have company, I asked him to thank them for us, and we were sure they would understand, but it was best that she not have any visitors that day. We would keep them posted via phone for now. He was pretty upset that she didn’t want to see him even though I explained to him the situation, and I knew it was more the fact that he was hurt and not really anger on his part, but it was really hard to tell by his actions. He was going to go tell our family, and then go get something to eat and go home for a while, told me to call him whenever she wanted to see him and left. Well, couldn’t worry about him, I had my daughter to go to..I walked back into her room, and sat by her bed for the next three hours. As she talked about events we had been a part of over the last three and a half years, I was amazed, each time it was as if they had just happened, the clarity with which she talked about them made me also feel like they had just happened. It was a very strange feeling, almost like one of those time travel scifi movies, where people travel to the future, but we were traveling back in time and reliving events. It was almost as if the things she was remembering were things that had left the biggest impressions on her. She would drift off to sleep for very short periods of time, then all of sudden she would wake up and be angry at her dad all over again, how she felt about him at those particular times were pretty intense, each time her blood pressure would shoot up and heart rate would accelerate..I learned very quickly to change the subject gingerly, and in some cases just go along with what she was talking about..I noticed and learned that if I tried to correct her or tell her what she was talking about wasn’t’ the case, she became more agitated..Because to her at that moment and in her mind, what she was thinking about was her reality, it was to her the current time and place where she found herself. She talked about her best friend, all of a sudden she would say that L had just left her room, “mom L said she will be right back”, then she would jump to “boy that was a lot of fun at the carwash” and when I asked her what car wash, she told me, “yesterday, the eighth grade carwash, you forgot already?” (which we had in April 2006), or something else completely different, she had just talked to a friend on the phone, or she had talk to her aunt that morning. .I found that I had to also be as quick on my feet with responses and thoughts to keep up with her, I was just never sure what we would be discussing next or what her mood was going to be, she took us through those last several years in quick flashes. I started to picture us as a ball in a pinball machine.

She finally fell asleep for a good thirty minutes, and when she awoke, she was still somewhat confused, but was also more aware of her current surroundings..The nurse kept checking for movement on her left side, she had all these tubes in her, each connected to a different bag of something or other, or going to two large monitors. She finally asked where her dad was, I told her that he had gone to get something to eat, I still approached the topic of her dad gently, the big proceed with caution sign popping up in my head, and asked her if it was ok to call him to come sit with her so I could go walk a little, I braced myself not knowing what her response was going to be, but she said “sure, you need to get something to eat too”. So I called to tell him, he had the green light to come back and see her, he was going to pick up something for me to eat and be on his way.

To be continued….

[A Birth Grandmother's Role]

Mari reading your last post my heart aches for you. What a scary time this was for you and your family. Your daughter and granddaughter are miracles. God was definately watching over them.

Hoping all is going well at home.Is Lauranda back to school and doing well? I think of you all often.

Char

Hi Char,

School is under way for my daughter, we are having some down time this weekend, or at least around the hours she is daily dedicating to school work, she is determined to stay ahead so she brought school work home for two subjects. We did give each other pedicures and I highlighted her hair, ummm I think the color was RED MADNESS (which she found appropriate for some reason)..

She is doing ok, for the most part, I guess I spoke too soon on the updated post last month, because a few days later to this past week, she has had to deal with weekly doctor visits or lab work, due to some health concerns, which first were thought to be a thyroid problem, but that blood work came back negative, so more labs have been done a few more times. There’s also thought that it may be due to the brain surgery and the pituitary gland, or stress put on her both physically and mentally with everything she has endured. Basically at this point nobody really knows, we have bounced between her ob and primary docs and now she has to add as she words it “yet another doctor to her long list of doctors already”, with an appointment next week to see an endocrinologist. And we will go from there….it’s a good thing we have stuck with taking one day at a time attitude, but I do sometimes feel like we are back on a mystery diagnosis episode. Our faith hasn’t wavered, we know whatever it is well be taken care of, eventually.. One of her biggest concerns is that nothing that she has been dealing with and going on will be hereditary, she doesn’t want her daughter nor her parents to go through what she or us have been through.. Thanks for asking about her..

Heidi, we had a wonderful day, we also spent time with my little nice and nephew,,,they are my daughter's pride and joy next to her daughter.

Blessings to all,

Mari