[Adoptive Grandparents Sue for Custody!]

How awful! How in the world did this man with a history of abuse become an adoptive parent? We have only started the process and see how much paperwork and checks that need to be done on our history and records. I definitely understand why all these check are done, but how did this man pass all the tests?

Tracey

MONEY

[When Agencies Turn People Down]

I am surprised that you guys don't need a severe bleaching at the end of a day with these kinds of calls.

[Managing Adoption Expenses]

That is why when someone asks about agencies, I do mention Abrazo. Isn't a state law here in Texas only agencies and attorneys do adoptions?

[Compulsory Adoption]

I had heard about this pathologist. He inflicted so much harm. Sadly this is happening more and more. Especially when there is financial motivation in some of these areas including the United States. I think it was Tennessee or Kentucky that had this issue. In the U.K., its pretty rampant. In fact, on one of the forums that I am on, the U.K. Representative that is trying to stop these kind of things recently joined. We all thought it was just a fluke but it is him.

What is really sad is that there are folks that should have their children taken. I know that there was two cases in this area recently where it should have happened. One case my daughters knew the boy that died. They were in day care together. In fact, my day care provider was his foster parent. Both of the daughters were taken in that case. I and others suspect that the step father is the one that killed the boy but there is no proof.

[Managing Adoption Expenses]

As an adoptee, I just can't bring myself to ask how much my parents paid for me. I will say that it makes me feel icky. You have explained many things to me. I will read this thread over again when I am not so exhausted.

[Compulsory Adoption]

When I was in junior high, we had a family friend's daughter get pregnant. I remember it well because I got both talks at the same time. For whatever reason, it severely disturbed my adoptive mother. My amom in her goofy wisdom contacted this old family friend. She answered for her daughter. They placed a note in the file to never contact them. In my travels over the internet I hope that he never contacts me. She had a son. I don't want to be the one to tell him that his birthmother's family doesn't want him around.

I have tried to convince my mother that she may not have had a choice. This girl is someone that I should have been friends with. Looking back I wonder if everytime she saw me if she saw her son. I bet big bucks that it was painful for her.

I have heard so many horror stories in adoption. I try not to bring it here. This place is light and airy for me. Its been a relief for me. It gives me hope.

As I learn more and more about adoption, it has become twisted in many ways.

http://www.bastardette.blogspot.com is an excellent example of the darkside. The more I read, the more I believe adoption as a whole needs a major investigation. It needs to be targeted towards the NCFA member agencies. That will never happen though.

[Compulsory Adoption]

We had that issue come up at the Vernon State Hospital. I quit because I couldn't handle how these women would have been treated. One of the reasons at least. Security at the hospital was filled with racists and sexists. Another story all together.

I had a bad experience with a doctor in Wichita Falls. Treated me badly. I had to take a patient to this doctor. Knowing that this fool delivered these children really scares me too. We have no environment for which these women were taught to care for their children. I think about what this kind of thing might have done to their already fragile psyche. That hurts more than the staff can begin to realize.

I heard at recent conference for the NCFA that Heidi Cox, Gladney adoption attorney, actually recommended that their member agencies go after women in these types of situations. That is scary beyond belief.

[International Adopters: Looking for a Shortcut?]

This scares me. We already have how many mothers and fathers fighting for the right to raise their own children. I know of at least eleven cases going on right now. What about the ones that we don't know about? There is going to be a real push on women who are pregnant and single. There are tons of agencies out there that are very unscrupulous. LDS Social Services and others come to mind. In fact I know one attorney out of Florida, Patricia Stowbridge. She has a yahoo message board or msn board that her staff monitors for young women looking to place and she contacts them. How many other attorneys pull this little trick? Prospective adoptive parents need to be very aware. There has been three to four cases of "fake" pregnant women out there trying to scam them. If we feel it is out of control now, what is going to happen in the future? I heard that Togo and Vietnam have also stopped their adoptions because of unscrupulous "baby" brokers. I heard that Guatemala is still undergoing staff changes in their government agency on adoption.

[Honoring Birth Siblings]

"Mom, They aren't my birthbrother and birthsister, they are my brother and sister." That was how I was raised. My adoptive parents got divorced when I was five. My mother remarried years later and he adopted me and my sisters. Then they had a child together. My mother laid down the law when we were little. There is no steps in our family. When I found out that I had a older sister and two brothers. I told my sisters that we had an older sister and two younger brothers. No birth, step, adopted. Nothing. They are family.