Garden of Hope
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Posts posted by Garden of Hope
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Welcome Kristin. We're glad you're here.
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"Single moms(and dads) need them to stay sane. Welll mayabe I should have said THIS single mom needs them to stay sane".
You were right the first time. Single Moms (and dads) need them to stay sane! I'm so glad that you are going out on a second date tonight!! I'll be sending positive vibes your way!!
Hugs,
jean
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Great point, Karen. Thanks for sharing the awesome dialog, too!
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Congratulations to the newest of the new Abrazo families. Your precious family literally glows in the gallery. I hope you will let us get to know you through the forum once your feet touch ground again! May God continue to bless you, your baby, and your baby's birthmom! Welcome to the Abrazo family.
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PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, check out the sweet picture in the gallery. What a beautiful sight. The joining of two families in the love of a child. Congratulations!!
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Good things come to those who wait, and wait, and wait! CONGRATULATIONS!! All in His time!
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Congratulations to the newest Abrazo family. It was meant to be and written in the stars. Your photo in the gallery is precious and shows the pride and love beaming.
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Congratulations to the newest mom and dad and the birthmom and her family too. The Abrazo family is rejoycing with you and so excited that the family continues to grow and flourish.
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Amanda,
Congratulations on your inquiry victory! That's step one. Now you fill out the application along with all the other things you have so dilligently completed and the agency will review your file. They will then accept or deny entry into one of the two programs they offer for adoptive couples. Read and consider the questions carefully. Respond from your heart. Then if Abrazo feels that you are a good match for their philosophy and agency, you will hear that you have been accepted into one of the programs. Then you are ready to be invited to an orientation. The orientation invitations are based on of the needs that the agency sees for the next twelve months. For example, if you are a couple who already has a child and want to return for number two and they already have 8 couples in their pool with the same type of situation, they may schedule you for an orientation further down the road because they don't want to accept more than they can reasonably expect to place within 12 months. I do know that upon occassion, if you have all your paper work in and there is a case or birthmom that the agency feels would be a perfect match, they might share your profile or information with that birthmom ahead of orientation. So, no, the application completion is not an automatic invitation to orientation, but it is the only way to get there if you are indeed going to partner with Abrazo to realize your dreams of parenthood. Also, realize that some couples, not many, but some, complete the application, attend orientation and then opt not to go with Abrazo because of differences in philosophy or whatever. So, not to be a downer
, but to give you the real head's up, FILL OUT THAT APPLICATION! BE HONEST AND SPEAK FROM YOUR HEARTS, then HAVE FAITH THAT GOD WILL LEAD YOU TO WHATEVER IS BEST FOR YOU. Isn't it great how that works? And, who knows? There have been a few very lucky/blessed couples who have gone to orientation on Friday and ended up as parents before the weekend was through. AND some who never even made it to orientation, we call them the "tweeners" (I am one of those). So....if you haven't already, think about your limitations--what are you looking for, dreaming of, able to handle......discuss it, research it, and then get it on the application! I wish you the best of luck. And you and your husband look fabulous! Savor that. It is one of God's blessings to you as well.Okay, enough rambling.......
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WOW! CONGRATULATIONS CONGRATULATIONS! The photos in the gallery are precious. You make a beautiful family! God bless you all and the birthmom, too.
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Birthmothers' Lament
(e. jurenovich)
My baby went through some tough times with me:
I used (to cope with my growing belly.)
I'm sorry I did it, I know it was wrong.
Will my child still get placed?
Will someone let her belong?
My baby's black, his health is good
Adoption's scary yet I think I could
But what a quandry it leaves me in
To think he's less wanted
just because of his skin?
My baby's brown, just like the dad
His first name was all the info I had.
It was one of those things, please don't say "tsk!"
Could you accept my child
despite the legal risk?
My baby's white, but came too early.
They say she'll have some problems, surely.
I called an agency, they said they'd see
if they even have
any families for me?
My baby's not a baby now.
It took awhile for me to see how
I could let go, but now that I'm ready
would there still be a home
for my tot and his teddy?
They say there are plenty of folks out there
Who want to adopt and have much love to spare.
Yet children never come risk-free.
The best hope for their future
starts with your family.
Let it be!
I have a poem in my head and hot wheels in my purse.......now I need to get the poem on paper and the hot wheels on the track. Thank you for your beautiful poem, Elizabeth. Stanza 2 rings true in my heart and head. Honestly, as Nathan's 4th birthday is literally hours away, I have had the desire to write what is in my heart and head and I will, if I can only find the right time. You always hit the nail on the head and express it with such flair. Bravo! Bravo!
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This is some topic. Prior to my husband dying he and I pursed adoption strongly. However, we were turned down by every agency we spoke with . He was ill and they would not approve us. At the time I was soooo unbelievably mad. Looking back I can see why. I just thought would would have been wonderful parents together. That was not to be.
I chose to continue my quest to adopt two years after his death. I was turned down by several agencies at the initial phone call. I would call and they would say we don't think we can help you at this time. I was just about to give up when a friend told me about Abrazo. They welcomed me and my single self with open arms.
........and now they can't get rid of me.
Sabrina
I, too, was turned down by a local agency that no longer exists as it was. Abrazo is one of the few agencies that looks past marital status and age. Phew, are we single girls (not to mention, this single girl isn't a spring chicken anymore) ever blessed because of that!
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What a beautiful family you make! Spencer Paul is so precious. I can't wait to hear all about him and your exciting adventure to greeting your son. May God continue to bless your family and the birthmom and her children. Congratulations. BOYS are the BEST!
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"With Abrazo it is NEVER too soon to start thinking about nursery stuff!!"
Or in our case, for Baby number 2.
But remember, your willingness to open your home to your child is your key to success here. You are building a family that will more than likely include one or more birthfamily members, in addition to your new child. Start preparing your heart to grow inconceivably larger and you'll be ready for whatever comes your way.
Christina
Christina,
Your latest posts have been wonderful and so "on target". Thank you for being the voice of reason among the flurries of excitment and "baby fever".
"Start preparing your heart to grow inconceivably larger and you'll be ready for whatever comes your way." When I read this sentence I had the image of the Grinch as his heart grows several sizes larger (In animated version of How the Grinch Stole Christmas). It is the perfect image of what happens in the case of open adoption for individuals who go into it with open minds and open hearts.
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I know some of you may find this last message disheartening, but please don't.
Abrazo is an awesome agency, as the many testimonials on this Forum continue to extole (sp?). However, it isn't the only agency and it isn't the best agency for every family, birth or adoptive. We all come into this process with specific needs and expectations. Abrazo tries to clearly state its needs and expectations so that those interested can choose wisely. And hopefully, you state yours clearly to them in your communications and paperwork so that the two sides can get an honest picture and judge whether the respective goals and intentions align.
But, many people start here with our beloved Forum instead of with direct agency contact. With so much information on the Forum, though, it may take a little while for prospective adoptive families to get a good feel for it all and so they may not recognize a good or ill fit until later. That is why I continue to urge "newbies" to contact the agency directly. Truly talk to and really listen to Angela, or Elizabeth if she's fielding calls that day. How comfortable you feel in that/those conversation(s) will be a good gauge for the "fit" of this agency to your family. And yes, waiting for phone calls may seem like it takes forever, after all, you want to get started NOW, but knowing for certain that you've found the right agency for you (whether you're an adoptive family or an expectant mother considering placement of your child) will make all the difference in the world.
And know, adoptive family, that reaching the point of sending in your inquiry or application does not mark the end of the growth you're going to experience. It's no time for "Whew. Now we're ready!"
Adoption is going to stretch you and your heart in ways you cannot fathom. It's good, but the stretching can hurt. And if Abrazo needs you to grow to be really ready for your child, don't you think the pain is worth it? And if Abrazo is not suited to provide the services you need, don't you want to find that out up front and not way down the line?
This process is profoundly personal (inspecting my septic tank?
), so you're going to be vulnerable and feelings can get hurt. Remember, that Abrazo is focused on the needs of the child, maybe your child, and keep that at the forefront of your mind and heart as you deal with the trials and tribulations of growing your family.Oh, how I remember the nervous days of waiting to see if we would be "accepted". I empathize with you and revel in the joy that is yours to come. You can see my family and the hundreds of other families on here at the end of the tunnel and know that this journey (taken with Abrazo or another agency) does work and it is worth it.
Blessings as you wait! It won't be the last time!
Christina
Very well said, Christina!
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Poor Pammy. I know the airport security had their reasons..........
Lucky Andrea and Don!! My grandmother was Clara. Beautiful name for a beautiful baby!
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Dear Noah,
I am sure that Jonas feels exactly the same way about you. He probably thinks you are the best big brother in the whole world and he loves being your little brother. You guys are going to be like "ham and eggs", chocolate and milk, "mustard and ketchup", or "peanut butter and jelly"! I know your parents are very proud of how you're handling your new big brother responsibilities and joys.
Keep writing. I love to hear what you have to say.
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A perfect beginning for the brand spanking new relationships and baby. Congratulations to everyone! Can't wait to hear all about it and see the photos.
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HI Franky,
You should ask whatever it is that you want to know. And you should definately talk with the TN families who have worked with Abrazo or are working with them currently as parents in waiting. Abrazo's whole philosophy is based on openness and honesty, so ask and they will answer. You can call and talk to anyone, but Angela is the adoptive parents coordinator. Elizabeth is the director and would also be great to talk to. She really tells it like it is and shoots from the hip.
I am a single mom. I adopted my son when he was 3 1/2 weeks old. He will be 4 early next month. Welcome to the forum. Keep us posted!
Jean
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Even after your own placement, does your HEART still skip a beat with each and every baby announcement??
Congratulations to the newest family!! It's fun to think about 1 more stocking to hang.
Even after your own placement--five (and a half, as Joshua would say) years later--my heart still skips a beat with every baby announcement, and I get CHILLS!!
Congratulations to the newest family!!
The answer is YES!!
Toni,
I love your new avitar!! So cute!
Congratulations to the newest Fool Family! Anxiously waiting all the news and pictures.
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My profile is the first part of Nathan's life book. (I wanted him to know how much I longed for him.) It's followed by a page describing the call from Kelly about him. (He was a Blessing on the Ground) and then loads of pictures of entrustment. It's all part of his story-our story--our family history!
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On a positive note, the one birthmom was able to reunite with her son. I would think that would give birthmoms with closed adoptions hope. Thank you for posting the link, Lisa.
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Nine times the excitment, Monica and Clyde when sweet baby Ella Lauren arrived. Congratulations to the couple who waited patiently to meet their baby girl. Congratulations on a dream come true with a birthmom and birthgrandma to add to the joy.
Tiffany,
Cute, cute picture of your little one!!
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WOW! What a beautiful family! Congratulations to the againer couple who only got to start their orientation weekend as PIW. What a blessing! God IS good ALL the time!
I need Advice
in Considering Adoption?
Posted
Elizabeth's answer is one of the reasons Abrazo is Abrazo and that is the fact that they speak HONESTLY and confront things head on. It's all about being open, honest, and true. I imagine that if you talk with Pamela, she can answer your specific questions and give you a head's up on what most birthmothers experience. However, as Elizabeth so eloquently stated, it is a painful process which is very individual based on many factors. If you read through the posts on this site, you will see that not everything is perceived as positive. There is joy and pain surrounding relinquishment and adoption. The ramifications are life long. I wish you the best in your decisions and journey. Please let us know how you are doing as you process your options and explore what is best for you and your baby.
Hugs,
Jean