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We received a letter from Abrazo letting us know that we were not accepted into the full service program but would be accepted into the "Designated" program. Has anyone had success with the Designated program? What does the fee cover? Are there advantages to use this vs. doing your own advertising?

Any information would be helpful as we are very surpised and confused by this news.

Thanks

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We received a letter from Abrazo letting us know that we were not accepted into the full service program but would be accepted into the "Designated" program. Has anyone had success with the Designated program? What does the fee cover? Are there advantages to use this vs. doing your own advertising?

Any information would be helpful as we are very surpised and confused by this news.

Thanks

Hi Jean and Kevin,

My suggestion would be to call and talk with Angela or Elizabeth. Have her/them explain the program and outline the reasons that the agency determined this was the best way for them to serve you. It has been my experience and my understanding that Abrazo accepts families into their various programs based on the family's needs and Abrazo's expected needs. They are very careful to only accept the number of families that they can reasonably expect to place in twelve months. For example, if you are a family with children already, they may feel that their pool of waiting families that fit that description is at the maximum to place within 12 months. Like I said, your fastest and easiest way to understanding is to contact the agency and ask the questions. It has been my experience that they will shoot from the hip and tell you like it is! Best of luck in your adoption journey!!

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The advantage of the designated program is that it gives families who might not typically appeal to the majority of Abrazo's birthparents (whether because of placement restrictions specified by the adopting family, lack of documented infertility/cessation of treatment, or other factors) a means of locating alternative matching opportunities, while continuing to benefit from Abrazo's proven expertise in case management and open adoption facilitation (and netting a substantial discount in agency program fees, in light of the fact that the birthparent match incurred no expense to Abrazo's huge outreach budget.)

Experts theorize that the majority of domestic adoptions done in Texas each year result from designated (sometimes known as "independent") adoption efforts, in which the birthparents and adopting family located each other without the assistance of any intermediary-- then secured the services of an attorney or agency to legalize those adoption arrangements.

Earlier this year, an inexpensive adoption ad placed in a free newspaper in north Texas attracted the attention of a just-delivered mom who was seeking a good home for her newborn daughter. The Abrazo couple responsible for that ad had already matched with another birthcouple and taken placement of baby boy; as a result, a family in our full-service program was thrilled to get that call. They can surely attest to their faith in the designated program option, because without it, they wouldn't have the darling daughter they do today!

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I just read the latest baby announcement.........and I am just wondering how a baby born in Colorado could be placed here in Texas? I thought the mother had to give birth in Texas, to be considered a Texas adoption. Does Colorado and Texas have some sort of reciprical agreement? How does this work??

I'm sure this could impact other couples...who are working with Abrazo but have a situation come up where they "find" their birthmother in their home state. (Don't know if I'm using the correct terminology here.)

I wouldn't be asking but the story of the newest arrival piqued my interest....and I'm sure other PIW might be curious too how this could work if they find themselves in the same situation?

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Actually, interstate adoptions go on all the time; they were just subject to much more legal scrutiny until a lawsuit in Utah about three or four years ago.

As a licensed agency, Abrazo can "accept" children born anywhere in the U.S.; to do so, however, usually requires a little extra work on our part....

Depending on the laws of the other state(s) involved, it sometimes means that (1) Abrazo hire an out-of-state attorney to handle surrenders in the state in which the child was born then file ICPC to transport the child back across state lines, OR (2) Abrazo bring the pregnant mother to Texas to deliver under our state laws, meaning she and her child are not subject to the laws of any other state and ICPC is not necessary unless the child is placed outside of Texas, OR (3) the birthmother and child travel to Texas to complete relinquishment here, meaning the adoption is subject to the laws of her home state and our state, and a double Compact must be filed, first securing the birthmom's home state's approval for the decision she has made here, before the Compact between Texas and the adoptive parents' state of residence can commence.

But regardless, we can and do work with loving parents outside of the Lone Star State whether they're placing or adopting! ;)

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An interesting article, out of Canada, about the private adoption efforts of would-be adopters there: Looking for Juno.

While it's tempting to think that 'all it takes' to adopt successfully is to attract a "suitable birthparent," the truth is that so much more goes into building a quality adoption; the finding and matching portion of that process is only the beginning! So our advice, to those who are interested in doing a private or designated adoption is to seek the guidance of a licensed professional first (someone who can help handle all the arrangements from start to finish, not just the search for birthparent candidates), and secondly, to not be beguiled into paying huge amounts of money to "profile advisors" or other cottage-industry types who can do nothing more than the marketing end.

Making your profile (or advertising) stand out has less to do with paying big bucks to somebody else and more to do with making it uniquely "yours"!

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In answer to a recent question raise by someone interested in having Abrazo involved in a placement plan in which the parties found each other via an unlicensed adoption factilitator from out of state:

The Texas Family Code expressly prohibits adoption facilitators, so Texas-licensed agencies cannot act as "intermediaries" to legalize placements that were initially "matched" by facilitators, for this reason.

Under our state laws, it is a criminal offense for anyone other than a Texas-licensed agency to introduce prospective birthparents and adoptive parents to each other, for a fee.

Prospective birthparents and adoptive parents living in Texas should be advised that their adoptions may be at legal risk, if the placement resulted from the "services" of any unlicensed "facilitator", "adoption consultant" or other baby broker, as these "services" are prohibited under Texas' state laws.

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A Point To Ponder?

If you've been waiting endlessly, but don't seem to be finding the child that you need,

perhaps it means it's time to start searching instead

for that child that needs you.

Though we haven't exactly been waiting endlessly, Matt and I are thinking about ways to search for the child that needs us. We're not sure where to begin, though. Newspaper? Website? Mass email? Anyone have suggestions?

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I'm curious what kind of traffic the folks with personal adoption websites advertised on google are getting?

We've had a number of families who found success advertising on parentprofiles.com over the years, and others who swear by the Thrifty Nickel adoption ads (ala Juno.)

And of course, as hburken could recently attest, sometimes the most effective means of finding a child who needs you and the birthparents who love them is through word of mouth...! ;)

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We sent out an email to our close family and friends. It was probably to about 50 addresses. It was brief and to the point, as anyone receiving this email would already know our story anyway. We basically said thank you for your thoughts and prayers during our time of infertility treatments blah, blah, blah, and that we had made the decision to move forward with adoption. We mentioned that we were homestudy ready in the states of TN & TX and and if they knew of anyone in the situation of having to make an adoption plan to please feel free to mention us or pass along our contact info. About a week later, we received a call from one of our best friends. She had a co-worker who shared with her that her son's girlfriend was contemplating making an adoption plan. The rest is history!

I also want to mention that a number of our friends and family also passed along our email to "their" close friends and family and we received the most amazing letters of support and encouragement from complete strangers who had been touched by adoption in some way, either by placing or having adopted themselves. It was an amazing time.

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I've been thinking of sending out a mass e-mail to all of our friends and family. Most of them know that we are trying to adopt but may feel that we don't want to talk about it or may feel that they are being nosey if they ask about it. After reading your post, I am for sure going to send the e-mail. It can't hurt right. Plus, our baby may be waiting for us through someone we know. Wouldn't that be wonderful. Thanks for the post. It is very encouraging and came as a great time as my hopes and positive attitude are starting to dwindle.

Melissa

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I agree Melissa, I think Donna's post is very very helpful to so many!!! :)

I wish I had been more involved in finding our baby, in hindsight I just wasn't there yet. At the time, I was still very private and secretive about our infertility and our struggles, not giving people enough credit for understanding, much less helping us. I could definitely do it now!

I think the more you talk about it, and not see it as this impossible dream, you will find "who" needs you most!

Karen

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I agree Melissa, I think Donna's post is very very helpful to so many!!! :)

I think the more you talk about it, and not see it as this impossible dream, you will find "who" needs you most!

Karen

I agree Donna's post is very helpful. I decided to sent out an email to close family and especially my aunt who is a labor and delivery nurse. We are about to send in our inquiry form into Abrazo but I figured being proactive couldn't hurt. I think I am much more open this second time around. The first time it was a slow reveal to our family that we were adopting. (I come from a large Mexican family with tons of aunts, uncles, cousins, etc.) Some of the relatives were hurt because they had no idea we were adopting (I hadn't gotten around to them I figured one of the more talkative relatives would of told them :) ). I was overwhelmed with how quickly they through together a shower and how they came to see Gabe the first day we brought him home. It was heart warming. Hopefully such a large family will provide more contacts! Best of luck to you Melissa!

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I just sent out the e-mail. I also come from a very large hispanic family. Two of them are also labor and delivery nurses and many are teachers. I am very open with all of them about us wanting to adopt but many of them leave far away and may not even know anything. My husband is still pretty private about the whole thing though. Hopefully we'll hear from someone soon.

Melissa

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Good Luck Andy and Melissa! - I also come from a large Hispanic faimily. I asked my mom and Ernie's mom not to say anything till we were matched. When we were matched i gave them the Okay to tell the rest of the family. It took telling one Tia (my side) for the entire family to know we were adopting. What is it with Tia's and Chisme :lol: ? Since then we have been approached twice about two teenage expecting/mothers that were contemplating adoption. And one has been VERY recent. Once she makes her decision I will be referring her to Abrazo. You just never know who your family and friends know or run paths with.

I look forward to following your journey.

Gina

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I just sent out the e-mail. I also come from a very large hispanic family. Two of them are also labor and delivery nurses and many are teachers. I am very open with all of them about us wanting to adopt but many of them leave far away and may not even know anything. My husband is still pretty private about the whole thing though. Hopefully we'll hear from someone soon.

Melissa

Melissa,

I am so happy to hear that you did this. You never know, this may be the way God has planned for you baby to find you. All my best to you and Danny and may parenthood not be too far off.

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Just a helpful little reading, for those who are interested in doing a designated adoption through Abrazo, or for those who may already be in our full-service program but willing to do some outreach in order to find an interested birthparent sooner and lower their agency fee, in the process: Adoption Networking: New Ideas to Try

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I've been considering doing the business card thing. I think my only hesitation has been that I tend to get obsessive compulsive with these types of things and I get to worrying about maybe I didn't put them in THE right places, or who has gotten one, when are we going to get a call, or maybe I should take some here and there. (This sounds like a really stupid reason not to do this as I am writing it so I am just going to do it). Do you suggest we put Abrazo as the contact person or a personal designated e-mail address or something else?

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I've been considering doing the business card thing. Do you suggest we put Abrazo as the contact person or a personal designated e-mail address or something else?

If you answer your phone 24/7 and don't get rattled by prank calls, then put your own tollfree number; if you want Abrazo to pre-screen every caller first, then put your names with our tollfree number, and let us know, so we can also inform our answering service to be on the lookout for these special callers. But I would definitely be inclined to get a designated e-mail address and put that on the card, as well... the more options they have for contacting you, the better!

Then hit every laundromat and community billboard and gas station and health clinic and school in town! :)

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I've been considering doing the business card thing. I think my only hesitation has been that I tend to get obsessive compulsive with these types of things and I get to worrying about maybe I didn't put them in THE right places, or who has gotten one, when are we going to get a call, or maybe I should take some here and there. (This sounds like a really stupid reason not to do this as I am writing it so I am just going to do it). Do you suggest we put Abrazo as the contact person or a personal designated e-mail address or something else?

I think that whatever method you use, the right birthparent will contact you at the right time. Maybe that will help you not be so anxious about the when and where with them?

Edited by Dale and Amanda

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Okay, Elizabeth...you've talked us into it! We've opened a "designated" email account and are going to try our creativity on some flyers or business cards. :rolleyes:

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A friend told me of a website who offers free business cards. I haven't ordered yet, but looked at the website and found they also offer websites. Hope this info helps our proactive friends...

Vista Print

Edited by Mohlers

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Guest jenmcd
A friend told me of a website who offers free business cards. I haven't ordered yet, but looked at the website and found they also offer websites. Hope this info helps our proactive friends...

Vista Print

Ann,

Yes! Vista print is awesome. When I first started teaching I used them to get free business cards to hand out to parents. All I had to pay was the shipping. They did a great job. And recently I bought business cards from them for my new business adventure. They did a great job and the free ones are just as good. The free ones have their logo on the back, but I didn't mind that at all. For the ones I bought I designed them myself on photoshop with a photo. If you would like me to email a pic of them let me know...

Good luck with that!!!

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I think my only hesitation has been that I tend to get obsessive compulsive with these types of things and I get to worrying about maybe I didn't put them in THE right places, or who has gotten one, when are we going to get a call, or maybe I should take some here and there. (This sounds like a really stupid reason not to do this as I am writing it so I am just going to do it).

I completely identify with your concerns!! (So it's not stupid :) ) It is a leap of faith to put ourselves "out there" in a public way. Good for you for taking a risk! Best of luck!

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