Dale and Amanda

Congratulations to the newest addition!

Congratulations to the newest family!

Congratulations to the newest families!

Committing to attend a future orientation and have the possibility of placement prior to it could make keeping the commitment difficult. Could admitting couples sans orientation while requiring others to attend cause issues with licensing? If there is a need to stop the orientations, then is there a way to develop the material into homework that couples are required to complete? Not that you have anything else going on!!

Congratulations Steven and Melissa! It all makes sense now, doesn' it? So happy for you. Enjoy these amazing days!

Erin, your post is on another topic that they had started. All is well!

Praying for these first families and that the right parents will know that they need to make that call!

Kristal, I think it is key that placements are made because parents believe it is what they need to do. I can't fathom all the thoughts and emotions that go into making an adoption plan. I only know what I hear from our girls' moms and a few others that have placed. Our girls' moms still have difficult moments, but they are content with their decision and are happy with the way we are raising the girls and with their decisions. From what I have gathered on the forum from the Abrazo Chicks, they tend to have families think through their reasons for placing and discourage it when it is due to feeling like they "have to." If it is a temporary issue, there are some programs that might help or family/friends that could provide assistance for a time until things turn around. I don't know how stressful a relationship would be if an adoptive parent knew that the birthparent regretted placement. There is no diplomatic way to say this--It totally sucks that adoption exists, but without it I would have such an emptiness in me. I did not want my joy at being a parent to be at another's expense. To this point, I am thankful that we are working through those issues with our girls' first families and doing our best to keep those relationships going and giving space when asked to. I appreciate your sharing another perspective of this often difficult process!

Congratulations to the newest family! Praying for all involved.

Congratulations to the newest family! Prayers for the first family as well!

I could really use some help from my forum family here. Our lead elder just returned this past week from China with the daughter they have been waiting for. He keeps making posts on fb referrng to her as his adopted daughter and my blood pressure rises every time and it grates on my last nerve. How can I best approach him online about this? They are working on bonding with her right now, so they are at home and we won't be seeing them for a few more weeks. I spoke to the church last weekend and printed up a pamphlet of positive adoption language with definitions for common terms.

Mari, I continue to be amazed at all your family has gone through and how amazingly your daughter and granddaughter are doing! I'm sure that graduation was a huge celebration!

Congratulations! So happy for you all, and continued prayers for you all as well!

Clearly Dale is better at thinking out his posts than his off-the-cuff wife!!!

I'm so thankful that Adrian knew that someone was willing to give him a chance. May he rest in peace and his daughters know of his love for them.

I guess I am missing something here. For most of us, whether we verbalize it or not, adoption was our last option to become parents. Trying naturally, using fertility treatments, and then following the adoption path, they are all avenues to have children. Isn't that clearly what our hearts desire? It does sound a bit crude to put it so bluntly, but that seems to be it in a nutshell.

Woohoo! Love baby anouncements and girls have an extra special place in our hearts!!!

So happy for the newest family of four!!!!! Praying for A in the days to come.

Kenny, I am sorry if you were offended by my comments. It doesn't seem that celebrities often adopt domestically and the media seems to perpetuate a notion that only international adoptions are worthy and the public (in my experience) has embraced the thought that international children need "saving." I don't think that adoption should ever be about "saving" a child from anything. I will say that we felt strongly about domestic adoption. I do not believe that everyone feels that way, and that is ok. Families are built in various ways, and that is absolutely amazing!

Suzi, the US thing is huge in my mind. It is so sad to see the disappointment on people's faces when I tell them that our girls are from TN and TX!!!

So sorry for this family's loss. We will definitely be praying for them in the days and weeks to come.

The topic doesn't make me uncomfortable, if that is what you were referring to, Elizabeth. I just am amazed at the audactiy of people to make such assumptions. We have those in our forum family that have had their family dynamic change at one time or another, and I don't think they are any less able to be good parents. We have some incredible single parents!!!! As for a change in family, did you not say that it would be detrimental to the child to lose one (presumably) bonded parent? Why on earth would it be suggested that the entire placement be disrupted and cause further trauma to this child when no one could absolutely know that it wouldn't happen with the next placement. I also wonder how on earth someone who has voluntarily terminated their rights could make any demands that would have legal basis?

Why do we feel the need to pick this family apart? Why can't we assume that they are truly doing the best for this baby, and that this baby was meant to be a part of this family, imperfections and all? If Dale and I would have had to be perfect to take placement, we wouldn't have a family. I make mistakes regularly and have to apologize to my girls for them.

Were you watching the Today Show? They had someone from People Magazine there and he said that the process had been a long one, and that they had to do the background checks and homestudies just like everyone else. It was refreshing to see that it didn't seem that there was preferential treatment because of fame and/or money.

People magazine has a picture of Sandra Bullock on the cover with a beautiful African American baby boy. Apparently she and Jesse James have been in the process of adopting (placement was in January?) and she will now be a single parent. I think this is the biggest reason she has seemed ok, she had a major focus on taking care of her baby. I hope this is a positive example for adoption!