Adam & Beth

Lisa, first let me say another thank you for consolodating this information. While (IMO) it can still be a bit intimidating or a little hard to follow as these posts have people from different states, different companies, and different insurance providers, it is still very nice to have a single source to gain some good knowledge. Per my conversations with my medical insurance provider, Methodist Health Care, once I receive the court document for the placement, I have 30 days to file a "Life Event" and the medical coverage will be retroactive to the time of birth. So, matching has no effect on us as those expenses are between us and whatever medical coverage the birthmother has at the time. But upon placement, we should be fully covered. This raises a question. So, even though I may responsible for medical bills if Medicaid is not in effect or if she does not have private insurance, will I be able claim those medical expenses on my tax return for the year since upon the placement the baby becomes my dependent? I would think so, just wondering for those of you who have had experience in this area. I know your medical expenses must be like 6.5% or more of your AGI (adjusted gross income), but a delivery could add a big chunk of expense to your annual medical bills. -A

Congratulations to all those who have been blessed with children already this year. Looking forward to seeing many more dreams fulfilled.

Jen (and your husband ) WELCOME!!! It is always great to see new faces, er, profiles, here We are very excited for you and wish you all the best in your adoption pursuit. As you will quickly find out, if you have not already from your 3 days of surfing the boards, there are many incredible people here and there is a vast wealth of knowlege about the adoption process among them. We look forward to many more posts from you and getting to follow and support you as you grow your family. ps) Please let you husband know it is totally cool to participate as well We need more guys posting here as we seem to be highly outnumbered on the guy/girl ratio -Adam I see you are from Austin. Great city. Only visited once and my wife's best friend lives there. We hope to make it back there soon.

Thanks. She had things lined up to work at the hospital as it can pay much better than private practice offices. But, then she figured that you simply can't replace spending time with your daughter so I think she is going to go with private practice since the hours are set and she can be home with Lily (her daughter) in the evenings.

My Sister-In-Law is a single mother who has been living with us for the past 6 months. She is moving out this week with our niece. She just passed the HESSIE (sp) which means she has completed everything for her nursing degree and can now get a GOOD JOB as a nurse and it should help out SO much with meeting the demands of a raising a 3 year old as a single mom. She still has the formal nursing boards in front of her in about a month, but this is a HUGE step in the right direction for her career. We are so VERY excited for her (and happy to be getting the house back to just the two of us -- we will be setting up (reestablishing) the nursery soon).

Mixed thoughts on this one. I think of it like an organ donor program. Not all organ donation is life/death situations. My old boss had to have corneal transplants because of severe eyesight problem. The catch, someone appoximately his same age with 'good' eyes had to die in order for him to get the transplant. These are more medical necessities. The uterual transplants are different, in my opinion. It is a new step in the battles with infertility. Insurance will likely never cover it as it is not a necessary medical procedure. As with any transplant situation, there is always the chance for rejection. Have enough studies been done and what effects the anti-rejection drugs would do to a fetus? It is just too extreme for US, but if you have the means, are sure the risks are worth the reward, then it seems okay. The evolution of modern medicine never ceases to amaze me. For some adoption is simply not an option and they will do anything than can to have a biological child. It raises the question of "If the process was proven to be safe, effective, and you had the means to do it, would you?"

I would like to raise a praise for the Abrazo program. In a simple whirlwind weekend (Orientation) you managed to pair us with some awesome couples that are not only good people who form an awesome support group in our journey towards parenthood, but also are people that are we can truly call that special word....FRIENDS. Thank you Abrazo

Fantastic news! We wish Brian, Gail, the baby, and the bp's all the best HAPPY New Year!

I understand COMPLETELY. Beth and I, though celebrating our 10 year wedding anniversary this year, have been together for about 14 years. It took us about 16+ hours of actual work putting our profile together as you can only fit so many pics and brief text passages on a page without it looking crazy . You want to say EVERYTHING, but with a finite amount of space, it was tough. We thought maybe we were doing something wrong, but others in our group spent that much time if not a little more. My personal opinion on it is this, whatever you do, make sure you are Happy with it. That document may likely be your first impression on a birthmother. I don't mean this as any added pressure, I mean, you want your first impression to be something you were happy with, so take your time and make sure you feel good about it. I was stressed over the amount of time and effort that went in, plus knowing this little booklet is supposed to say who we are, but when it was all said and done, I can honestly say we are very proud of what we put together. So, don't stress. Take it one step at a time, and in the end, it will be something tangible you can share with those who want to know more about "how the process works". I know we have received many compliments and thanks from our close friends and family with whom we shared our profile. It gave them a better idea of how a birthmother gets started in making contact with potential adoptive parents. In this journey to grow our family, there is not a lot of tangible stuff we can share with others on how this works. -A

Nichole, the girls at Abrazo will send you some sample profiles in your Orientation packet. I'm sure they would be happy to fax one to you or perhaps send you a copy prior to then. In short, think of it as about 5-6 pages (3 sheets/duplex), color copied, and a scrapbook kind of feel with some possible 'theme'. Then the FUN part...trying to condense your life into 6 pages of pictures and text. --Adam

This was not a requirement when we were PIW 8 1/2 years ago....but I bought my home new from the builder (19 years ago!), and just always kept the builder's brochure showing each of the homes for sale at that time with their floor plans (so I have all my neighbor's floor plans too!) So if you are in the process of buying a new home, or have recently purchased a new home, ask the builder for a floor plan. It's just an idea I wanted to pass on! I'm not sure you even need anything Formal. I mean, a hand drawn diagram might work and I'm sure doesn't have to be to scale. You can write in the room dimensions. The pictures of various rooms already show a lot as to what the house layout might be. I did not see this requirement in our packet of information so we have not yet submitted one. The Pack will be watching the Big Game from the same place my Cowboys will be....the comfort of their own home. Favre went to college and has a farm in my hometown. He's big down there too. I'm personally not a fan of his, but I do give credit to all he has accomplished. Congrats to the Packers on finishing 8-8 (especially on taking out the Bears in the last game). I think that surprised most everyone based on how the season started. There is a place in the Hall of Fame for Mr. Fav-ree.

Arianna is a beautiful name. This story has become 'legendary' as to how quickly things can move in the process once you have everything complete. The first couple in our Group (the H3's --Happy Holiday Hopefuls) matched with their birthmother 3 weeks after Orientation and are expecting the newest addition to their family in April. Several of us (who had their home studies complete by Orientation) received our first Birthmother calls within days of leaving Orientation. It is an amazing ride and you truly will meet some amazing, fun, kind, and genuine people through the Abrazo program. -Adam

Nichole and Joe, Just one more friendly welcome to the Abrazo forum. It's always great to see new people joining in and working with Abrazo to make their dreams of a family come true! -Adam

It only gets worse after orientation! TELL ME ABOUT IT!

Of course one of the Abrazo clan would best answer it, but I can tell you here in TN, the prints are done through a contractor for the state & the TBI (Tennessee Bureau of Investigation). The contractor's site says the background check request (fingerprinting) must come from the Agency as the results cannot be released to the individual. Our Social Worker (who works for an agency) is going to set it up. We just need an update since we did ours last year, but it is the same process as having it done for the first time. So, it seems very odd to me that your Social Worker could not set it up. Surely they work for someone that does them up. Strange. So, sorry, I know this doesn't help much, but I'm sure one of the Abrazo staff will be on before long to answer your question. If not, just give them a call.

Whether it be in January or February, it is a great, fun, informative, whirlwind weekend. All the people involved from Abrazo to the attendees, are wonderful people. Congrats on getting your Profile done already. Others will be very jealous of you at Orientation as that is a huge step.

Kristin, Congrats to you and Rich. Having the Profile completed already is a huge step forward in the process. Happy New Year to you both! --Adam

You are certainly on your way to not only being PIW's but also great forumites as you seem to have this posting thing down After Abrazo receives your formal application (lots of paperwork, but really good & important stuff) then you will be invited to a Parents of Tomorrow Orientation. After you complete Orientation, the Abrazo crew gives you a certificate officially welcoming you as a Parent In Waiting (PIW). Of course you also have lots more paperwork, a homestudy, and profile to complete, but it's all part of the process and the best thing about this process is that you will soon be a parent Have a very Merry Christmas, Adam

We've had the opposite problem. More than enough pictures so WHICH ones do we use. Think we have made good choices thus far, but working them into 8.5"x11" pages really limits what you can fit on a page. Doing lots of photo shrinking and reprinting on the printer lately. Most of all, make sure you feel good about the profile. If you feel good about it, then it will convey who you are to the birthmother and the right one will click. You only get one chance to make a 'first-impression', so make it one you are proud of. -A

You two sound like a really fun couple. Enjoyed this post. I'm sure the girls at Abrazo will have you so busy with paperwork soon, you won't know which way is up

I can't speak of any specific state laws, I just know in TN we had to do the electronic fingerprinting. The other posts I saw in this thread seemed dead on to what we had to do in TN. We used Identix for the electronic fingerprinting as well and it was about $50 per person. Did it Summer of 2005 as we were pursuing a private adoption. I never followed up regarding receipt of the results as I figured I would only hear if there was a problem. Had the receipts to prove we had done them. I know our homestudy specifically mentions the FBI check was run and all came up clean so they got them (all this is in regards to our adoption agency in Memphis). Our homestudy has been sent to Abrazo so I think they have everything they need at this time. I know they'll let us know if that is not the case. In the short time I've known them, they seem like really great folks. Looking forward to getting to know them better with our Orientation in a few weeks. Best wishes to all in getting all the "fun" paperwork and things out of the way. --Adam