again, at the risk of repeating myself - WOW!!!
my own children are the most important gifts i have ever been given, and i would die for them if need be. therefore, when my daughter told me she was pregnant - and how it happened - my heart was shattered into a million pieces. she did not want to have this child at all, and although it's never the child's fault, i could not blame her. i was ready to support that decision, not matter the hurt. but God, in His infinate wisdom, made absolutely sure we never had enough money to terminate. but still my daughter was in so much agony, and watching her go through this just about killed me. she found an agency that was 'helping', but she was still unemotional, distraught, and distant from this child. there was so much resentment aimed at him, and i knew that wasn't healthy - for either of them. then came Abrazo - i CANNOT sing your praises enough, ladies!!!! - and after talking with a CARING and HONEST 'rep' on the phone, Diana knew she had finally been HEARD. then came the 'interviews' with some APs. she liked them all, but immediately clicked with the Wilders. they were perfect, and so understanding and compassionate to her situation. my 'baby' had a gleam in her beautiful blue eyes once again - there was light at the end of her tunnel!!! hope on the horizon!!! how my heart has swelled!!!!
i know there is still such a hard road for her ahead, and that light may disappear behind the trees from time to time, but knowing it is still there is what matters. having almost daily phone conversations with Ashley, and coming to the Forum, has brought Diana within sight of the shore - she is no longer stuck out at sea. now i rejoice, and know that through the times to come - the good and the hard - that i will have the strength to stay by her side and hold her hand through this. not lead and make her follow, nor stay behind and push, but walk side by side and be what she needs me to be. her mother.