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monicaedwards

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Everything posted by monicaedwards

  1. Congratulations to Kristy and Paul. What a beautiful boy!
  2. Yes, infertility is definitely something that you need to come to terms with before you take your next step. It is a really hard thing to accept that the dream you've had your whole life isn't going to come true the way you invisioned it. Unsuccessful infertility treatments are just as hard to accept and deal with. However, if I knew then what I know now, I'm not sure I would have put myself through that. I cannot believe that I would have been any happier with a child I gave birth to myself than I am with the precious child I adopted. The adoption process can be just as hard and scary as the infertility treatments but for me the outcome was so much more wonderful. Everyday I thank God for that journey and His wisdom of what was best for us.
  3. That's right , young lady, it's time for the mommy of newborns to be in bed, especially if he is. Hope you had a great holiday, Melissa. Now get some sleep.
  4. Melissa, I'm interested in that thread too (the one about what kids call their birthparents). Ella is only 2 but when I talk to her about this I say birthmommy and always use her 1st name. It's just the most natural thing for me to do. I haven't thought about it from the angle of what Ella will can her birthmom. Maybe I need some guidance.
  5. Congratulations to the newest family! What wonderful news to complete my day.
  6. THis is always the best news to hear. Congratulations!
  7. Sounds like you might have a future Barbara Walters or world leader on your hands.
  8. That "announcement" is truly horrible. Let's hope that the motivation for he adoption is better than this implies.
  9. Elizabeth, that's sad to hear. two of my cousins were adopted back in the 60's and my aunt and uncle told them as soon as they were old enough to understand. it must have been very young, because I can remember my cousin as a four-year-old and she talked about it even then. but I love your recommendation to tell the child from the very beginning so that we get used to telling the story and get super comfortable with it. One of my cousins I mention above wants to adopt, too, and so she and her husband are closely watching our adoption process. Same thing with a couple of friends of ours. I think you might just have a Kentucky contingent on your hands once we have our baby! You said that's how it usually starts. With one couple. I have a question - my aunt and uncle were told by the state agencies where they adopted so many years ago to never try to get their children to believe in Santa or the Tooth Fairy or any other mythical character because when they later found out it was make-believe, it would upset them more because they were adopted. I never understood that reasoning, but it was a subject brought up many times in my family growing up. As in, "Don't tell your cousins that there is a Santa Claus" etc, etc. I haven't ever seen it mentioned in adoption books. Did the state agency simply make that up? Or is that something they used to tell families in closed adoptions? That sounds kind of of bizarre. Why would adopted children react any differently to it than others? I really wouldn't want to give up any of that with my child. I love my memories of believing in Santa, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy.
  10. I agree that neither type of adoption should be seen as better or worse. The article that Elizabeth posted seems to pick quotes to make international seem worse. FOr example: International adoption isn't the answer to improving the overall plight of children in developing countries. Even the strongest supporters admit the movement of adoptees across international borders represents only a tiny fraction of the neglected, abused and abandoned children in these countries. And supporters of international adoption are quiet about the children who are not adopted and left behind. Even though adopting one child won't solve the overall plight of children in that country, it will change the future of that child and giving a child a bright future is a worthy endeavor. Most of us can only hope to change things one child at a time. That being said, we are thrilled with our domestic adoption and will hopefully adopt domestically again. It has been the right thing for us.
  11. I definitely believe this to be true. I was talking with a woman last week who was completing her and her husband's application for Abrazo. She asked me when we plan to tell Ella about her Adoption experience. I told her that I talk about it with Ella all the time. I realize that she can't understand yet but I never want there to be a time when she didn't know. I don't want her to have some memory of the trauma of finding out. I have a friend who found out she was adopted when she went to get her medical records to get into college. Her file had "Adopted" stamped across it. She thought it was a mistake so called her mother and jokingly said "Guess what I found out today...I found out that I'm adopted." Instead of laughing and saying it was a mistake her mother said "Who told you?" She of course felt a little betrayed because they'd never told her; especially since she knew that her brother was adopted. I know this was considered the right thing to do years ago but I hope we have learned from those mistakes.
  12. I just stumbled upon this thread for the 1st time. It's so touching and hope that these children's homes find them soon. I'll be reading this more often.
  13. I loved the Jamie Lee Curtis interview. She is the most grounded celebrity I've seen who has adopted. If only they all approached it like she does. I agree, it's refreshing to see a famous person who did something and didn't use it for publicity or as a ploy to "save the world". She's a person like us who just wanted to be a mother and found a wonderful way to do it. What an advocate she will be when the time comes. As for Paris Hilton, bless her heart, she just doesn't have a foot in reality.
  14. Good luck Brian and Cathy, I hpe it goes well for you this weekend. Like someone else said if they're not thrilled at first, give them time. As they see you get excited they will too, and once that baby gets here they will be head over heals in love. My in-laws were cautious (complete understatement) at first but now they adore Ella. I think it's been a surprize to them how they feel no different about her than they do about their birth grandchild. Family love is a wonderful thing, it knows no bounds.
  15. I'm right there with y'all. As much as I wanted the experience of carrying and giving birth to a child, if I had been able to do that I wouldn't have exactly the child that I have now. Since I first saw her I've felt strongly that exactly this child was meant to be mine and me to be hers...and I know that my husband feels the same way.
  16. Love this idea. Where would any of us be without the courageous birthfamilies and the people who work to make adoption possible?
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