teresa

Hello all my name is Teresa and I'm a birthmom. I was 7 mos. pregnant when I called Abrazo. It took me that long to finally make the call. I was considering all my options. I was desperately searching for a way to keep this baby and raise him myself. I have a 4 yr old and I get plenty of help from her Daddy and his family, but I was still struggling with just her. I spent countless days and sleepless nights trying to find a solution. The father (sperm donor is what I like to call him) of this child refused to be a part of his life. In addition, I would not have the help, or the much needed emotional support of my family. I kept telling myself, I would give anything to keep him and raise him with his sister. But, with my heart's desire came the underlying reality. I knew I could not allow my son to begin his life with the disadvantages I was facing. It was so hard to make that decision on my own. It felt as if all the negative circumstances were overwhelming me. The truth within them became the driving force in my decision. When I finally called Abrazo, I spoke to the most amazing woman. (she knows who she is ) She made me feel like what I was doing was okay. She arranged for a few parents in waiting, to call and speak with me. The second phone call I received was from Craig and Maralou. I would never have imagined that, talking to two strangers on the phone would be so comforting. In their eyes I was an angel, and the child I was carrying was the answer to their prayers. In my heart, they were the unexpected answer to my prayers. The more we talked, the more I believed in this wonderful couple. I knew they would give my son all of the things I couldn't. I had more love for him than the heart could hold, but every child deserves more than that. In the following months, we continued to contact each other. We soon began an open and honest sharing of thoughts, feelings and emotions. In doing this, we created a communication so natural, and a trust so complete. The one thing that burdened my very soul, was the thought of giving my son up. To me, the word "adoption" meant something final. I knew Craig and Maralou would be wonderful and loving parents. But, I was already feeling the pain and just didn't know how to prepare my heart for more. Well, I didn't have to, something wonderful happened---they suggested an "open adoption," and explained their reasons for doing so. They said, they would not only be adopting my son, but gaining me, my daughter, and my family as their extended family. In turn, they would become an extension of my family. My son would be mine and theirs. He would have two Moms and a Dad. This would be a giving and sharing of two families, joining together and becoming "one." They will share him with me, my daughter and my family. This was like a dream come true, I could hardly wait to meet them. A week before my son was born, Craig and Maralou were here, and we finally got to meet in person. My daughter liked them from the moment they met. My family, friends and everyone who met them, felt the same. With each passing day, we were sharing past and present moments of our lives, talking, laughing, and dreaming. I was feeling the love and kindness they possessed. I experienced much more. They went with me to my last and final appointment. That day the doctor told us that they will be enducing labor the following monday. I had to show up sunday night at 10pm. They checked my cervix to see if I dialated any and sent me home, only to return monday morning at 6am. Every step of the way they were there. They both took turns holding my hand. They were both there to experience new life being delivered. To see their face when Tyler Luis was born was the greatest feeling. We spent 3 days in the hospital, all 4 of us, together in a room. Those 3 days were a real roller coaster of emotions. I know it was there in that hospital room was where we made the bond stronger. I was able to see how much they really did love and care, not only for Tyler but love and care for me as well. In todays society it's really hard to trust and believe in anyone. Wacthing Craig and Maralou take in Tyler as their own, was an amazing experience for me. I had no doubt in my mind that I picked the best Mom and Dad for Tyler. Our relationship is one that will last a lifetime. For any future birthmoms reading this please know that you are not alone. Know that you can trust and depend on the abrazo women to back you up in any decision you make. Ultimately, in the end it is your decision to make but know that you don't have to do it alone. I Love You Tyler