keepingfaith4us

Congratulations to all who love him!

Bob fought very hard and I am sad to learn of his passing. We worked with him and Monika for Jordan's finalization and are fond of them both. Thoughts and prayers go out to his family, his dear paralegal Monika and the Abrazochicks that are mourning him.

Mari, another recommended book for PIW's is the Open Adoption Experience, it is another good resource.

Hope.....what all of us find when we find Abrazo. Congratulations to the newest formed family united in Hope. Wishing you all a lifetime of love. Your daughter's name is beautiful.

Congratulations, Matt and Katie!

Welcome, baby Isadora! Congratulations!

Welcome to the world, Hudson! Congratulations to all who love this adorable baby!

Congratulations, Helen and Justin on becoming parents! Blessings wished for you all!

Mari, I am so glad that you have some answers. I am hoping you feel better very soon!

((((Mari)))) I also cannot imagine the pain that first moms and Monica have to endure. She is sooooo courageous and brave to choose adoption for her girl and I know she loves Jordan very much. She told me recently via text that she knew we were going to be great parents and that she is not disappointed in us. Those words from her were such a gift to me to hear(read) and I love her so much for giving me that peace. I can't imagine how hard it would be to be a first mom and see your child again with their parents,like you said ripping that scab open. Mari, it really breaks my heart to think of the little support that Monica has for her. She is extremely shy and doesn't have very many friends. Her family opposes her having placed and having an open adoption, they have told her that they think openness is weird and have voiced that she shouldn't know about us or Jordan. So we are hoping through time that they can see we mean well, our intentions are good and that we want them in our lives too and especially be more supportive to Monica. I think from looking on her FB page she may be gaining a couple more friends that I am hoping will turn out to be closer, deeper friendships and that she will be able to confide in them. A very positive thing is that she confided in her boyfriend and told him about Jordan. She says he is very supportive of her and her decisions and I am hoping that he will be that rock that she needs. I know when we made our trip last March, she shared with him about us being there and our wishes to want to connect with her. She told me that she would show him our pictures I posted on FB and he told her "You should go meet them, you know you want to." So I am very thankful that she has him and that he is supportive of her and loves her. Also I am hoping that even though she hasn't accepted our invite to see her (and her boyfriend) this March yet, that we may still get a chance when we get there. I know she knows she is always welcome to go to group and that the Abrazochicks are always there for her, but I think that might be one of those things she just feels will open up that wound again. Ya know? You do bring up a good point though about connecting with others that can relate and I think I will remind her she is always welcome there when we chat next. Hugs to you too, Leah! I know it is hard when we really want to have access and involvement with our children's first parents and it isn't possible. I know you know this already, but just wanted to keep encouraging you to not ever give up on them, you just never know when that door will open for you and for Alexander. In our case the door is opening gradually, but if you would have told me a year and half ago that we would be where we are today, it would have blown my mind. It's not in our control, but we can still have hope and make touches to let them know we are still here with love.

Mari, Jordan's first mom is in the picture by relationship with me only at this time (Jordan is 2 1/2). We communicate through text mostly, but we are also friends on FB and occasionally by phone. We would love to see her in person and be able to have Jordan and Monica meet, but it isn't reciprocated. Since Jordan was entrusted to us we have offered many times to visit with her in San Antonio, invited her and the girls to come to camp and asked if we could pick her up and treat her to a day/weekend of fun with us but she just isn't ready to have face to face contact with us post placement. I will be honest and say for a long time I took this personally and felt that I had failed our daughter and Monica and that I had done something wrong. I wore guilt on my shoulders and felt horrible for failing at having the open relationship that we talked about having pre placement. There came a day when I had to be more understanding of Monica's grief and to try to accept that she didn't know what it was going to be like to endure a placement of her child that sometimes hopes change. That it really wasn't something I needed to be wear guilt for and had to let that go. Through the last year our relationship has opened up more. She is becoming more responsive to me and my attempts to reach out to her. Most of my texts to her are answered now and we have shared a few great conversations by phone that I treasure. Every time I post a picture of Jordan on FB, she 'likes' it and has sent me a few responses privately about how big she is getting or how cute she is. We send her gifts and pictures, to let her know we love her, and to remind her she is treasured by our family and that we are ready for more personal contact for her and for Jordan when she is ready. With all this being said, we still find it crucial to give Jordan roots, to have her adoption and birth family be a part of her development. We are very thankful to Abrazo and the community to help us help her with this understanding. When we make our trip in March we come to celebrate Jordan, to celebrate being a family and to celebrate meeting her precious birth family who gave her life and entrusted her to us. We do things like, drive by her home that she lived in utero with her birth family, visit Christus Santa Rosa where she was born, visit the AbrazoChicks, the courthouse where we finalized and will take her to the children's museum (we all visited there preplacement and have pictures of all her parents together, her birthsisters and her in her moms tummy). We also talk about Monica regularly in our home and show her pictures of her that I download from her FB page. We tell Jordan that she has another mom, that her name is Monica, that she is her beautiful tummy mommy, that she and D met us at Abrazo in San Antonio. We have one of those pictures of us all at the children's museum framed in her room so she sees them regularly and grows up knowing we love them and hope she will grow up knowing and feeling comfortable to ask questions or to come to us with any sadness she feels. I have faith that one day we will be able to give Jordan face to face contact with her mom and sisters. We won't ever stop trying to foster that relationship for her, not to mention Scott and I love her and miss her. As far as the birthdad goes, I don't know if we will ever see him again, hopefully one day he will ask Monica or Abrazo how to reach out to us. Thank you for asking, I love knowing you are interested and I open the door to you for any questions to me or feedback. Also, I ask for help you might offer in ways that I might be able to encourage Monica understand the importance to Jordan in having her in her life. Merae

Mari, our family makes a trip to San Antonio every March to teach Jordan about her birth story and to make attempts at reuniting with her birth family. It's looking like it will be March 14-16 this year and we would love to meet you then if you are available. I'll message you and see if we can't set up a date. :-)

Mari, I never came back and posted on your original post, although, I was very moved when reading it and got teary along with you. You are a gem to this community and I (probably along with many others) just want to give you a big giant hug and "adopt" you as a friend. I love reading and learning of the support you give your daughter and the honesty you have shared with us all about how tough it was/is but how your love for your family overcomes and makes it all worthwhile. I look forward to meeting you one day and giving you that hug in person, you have a special place in this community and in my heart. Lauranda, Sloane and her parents are very blessed to have you in their lives and to enjoy your love and family. Happy (early) birthday to one beautiful and beloved little angel, Sloane! Merae

Naveah will surely treasure her too! Welcome to the world, baby girl, Naveah, you are loved!

Congratulations, Dana and Tisha, on becoming parents and united with a loving mom to become a forever family! Welcome to the world precious babes!

Welcome to the world baby Abigail, may you be surrounded in love!

I love the picture of the 3 of you! Your smiles are beaming and speak volumes to the happiness you feel. So proud of you two for getting ready so fast and being there when your son and his birth parents needed you! Congratulations!!

Welcome to the world, baby Ryder and congratulations on the newest family of 4!!!

Sooo exciting!

Merry Christmas to you and yours, Mari!

Sooooo excited for this family and can't wait to see who it is! Excited for them and proud that they are able to step up and get ready for the mom and child that needs them. What an amazing Christmas they will be having this year!

Jordan has two birth sisters that she does not know at this time in her life. I hope she does have a relationship with them one day, but I do also know that when she does get to meet them and enjoy them that she will feel loss of not being with them, sharing everyday life. My thoughts and hopes are that they will have a natural, inherent sister bond within them that will take bond them and give them a desire to want to love and know each other even though they are not growing up in the same family. I have to run. I will come back later and post more.

So happy for all of you! Congratulations!

So happy to hear the baby weve been praying for has found a new home and family! Praying for his transition and his new family!

Brent & Lynn, we are so very happy for your family.