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Jocelyn

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Everything posted by Jocelyn

  1. Jocelyn

    Adopting a second time

    Not sure where to post this or if there is another topic but does anyone know of a children's book that talks about trying to prepare the older child for a new sibling? We've talked to Landon about having a baby brother but he will usually say no if we ask if he wants a little brother. I wonder how much he understands at age 2 about a new baby coming (hopefully). Sometimes I feel like he would understand what is going on if I were pregnant because then he could see my belly growing and that things are changing. Obviously I don't have that so how do you prepare them for a new arrival?
  2. Jocelyn

    Baby Announcements 2012

    Congratulations Nathan & Grace! Jocelyn 1st-N-10 and BGE&s
  3. Jocelyn

    Baby Announcements 2012

    Congrats and welcome Baby Lucas!
  4. Jocelyn

    A Birth Grandmother's Role

    I'm sorry to hear that is happening but as Melissa and Hannah have said glad that you can be there for her. We found out last night that one of Scott's friends is most likely going to have chemo for testicular cancer. Kinda shocked to hear that...he's 39. You just never know what life is going to throw at you, so finding that inner strength is the best way to cope.
  5. Jocelyn

    Open Adoption

    Wow Tara, I'm glad that you found Abrazo after that experience! Yes, adoption costs money but that should never ever be a factor into whether you should place or not. Money is money, sometimes you lose some and sometimes you win some (if only any of us would be lucky enough to win the lottery). Regardless of your knowledge of adoption and the practices, I wish all agencies would have the moral code of Abrazo and be truthful with everyone involved in adoption.
  6. Jocelyn

    Baby Announcements 2012

    Congratulations Andrius & Gaby and welcome Baby Xavier! Very heppy for you and your new family!!
  7. Jocelyn

    Baby Announcements 2012

    So happy for you Kim & Gip! Jocelyn 1st-N-10 and BGE&s
  8. Jocelyn

    What is Open Adoption?

    I agree with this as well. People ask us about our relationship with Landon's birthfamily and the best answer I have is that it feels like family. And by that I mean that I see them as the same way I see my sister or my in-laws or my cousins ans so on. They are just part of the family, it doesn't matter to me that they came into our lives a couple years ago and as a result of adoption. I also think that embracing open adoption does help open my eyes to be more accepting of others and their situations. I still fall into gossip and may make some comments about certain people or things, but I consciously know that this is happening less and less and that I'm trying to put myself in that person's situation before judging them on something. I think adoption had something to do with that...but I also think just raising a child and being forced to focus on someone other than myself has helped tremendously. When I look at Landon and he's being goofy or says something that just makes me smile, it makes me realize that the petty thing I was gossiping about or the irritation with a co-worker over a small issue really isn't that important. I think having a child now has helped me get past some of those things. I still have times when I need to vent or when I'm frustrated but I feel like I worry less about things I can't control and more about things that I can control.
  9. Jocelyn

    Open Adoption

    Thank you for protecting your agency and its birthparents!! I agree! People talk to us often about adoption and ask for agency info because they are looking or know someone looking. We always let them know that Abrazo wants couples that want an open adoption and we can now add our personal experiences as an example. Open adoption is a hard concept in the beginning but I think it's just because of the unknown...but you have to be willing to learn more about it and open your minds and hearts to what it means. And people should be truthful with what they really want and find the right fit.
  10. Jocelyn

    A Birth Grandmother's Role

    Mari, you are inspirational as always, even in a time that is difficult for you. Hoping these next few days go by fast so you can get through those memories.
  11. Jocelyn

    Baby Announcements 2012

    Congratulations to all! Jocelyn 1st-N-10 and BGE&s
  12. Jocelyn

    A Birth Grandmother's Role

    Great quote Mari! You always have such good quotes that you share...you must have a secret hiding place that you get these from. I haven't always commented after your posts with these quotes but I do read them all and think they are great and glad that you post them!
  13. Jocelyn

    A Birth Grandmother's Role

    Coming to the realization that its time to say goodbye to a beloved pet is very hard but a fact of life that you have to go through sometimes. My thoughts are with you. Jocelyn 1st-N-10 and BGE&s
  14. Jocelyn

    APPLICATION

    Well said Monica!
  15. Jocelyn

    APPLICATION

    Yes, it's good times! The nice thing was that we referenced our old application a lot to help with some of the details. It was interesting to see how we answered the questions in what I'd call the essay portion of the app...and then to think of how our views had changed after going through the adoption process once. For instance, I vividly remember the question on what contact info we'd share with a birthfamily and the first time we answered it something like "we'd share our email address". I'm sure we were afraid of being bombarded via phone, mail, and a visit on our doorstep by a birthmom looking for her child back in a couple years...um silly us! We had a lot to learn but I can look back at some of those responses and worries and see how we've grown in the 3+ years since we first started looking into adoption. I didn't really enjoy filling out ALL the paperwork again but understood why we needed to and it was kinda fun to reflect on where we were in the past and where we've come to now.
  16. Jocelyn

    Family Opposition?

    We were also unsure of what open adoption meant. We have friends that adopted one child from Guatemala and their second child was born in Chicago and they maintain an open adoption. We always thought it was weird that they stayed in contact and that the adoptive mother was in the delivery room. But like most people we just were uneducated about it and were judging without knowing everything. That's why I think orientation is so great to go through because it opens your eyes and the books that Abrazo recommends help do that as well. I'm also interested if your mom's views on everything having been adopted herself.
  17. Jocelyn

    Speaking of "real parents"

    I just read the article as well and think Mari's quote from Bette Davis is very true. I can say that I have a good relationship with my parents now but I remember times when I tested them and said mean things. I'm sure most of us can relate to that. Sometimes as adults I think we forget what it's like to be a kid. Kids go through so many changes both physically and mentally, so we just have to try and handle things with grace and not overreact if they tell us they hate us. Start building a good foundation when they are young and if those days come when they are angry and hurtful then you can tell them you will always love them. Remember that tomorrow is a new day and as long as you love your kids and they know you love them things will be ok (and this applies to all whether your kids are adopted or not).
  18. Jocelyn

    Home Study Updates For Againers

    We had to go through everything again for the state of MN (fingerprinting, residence history, etc), even though it was considered an update. So you'll just have to make sure you meet the requirements of both states.
  19. Jocelyn

    Especially for Abrazo's Againers

    Are you hinting at something Sara? Jocelyn 1st-N-10 and BGE&s
  20. Jocelyn

    A Birth Grandmother's Role

    Woo Hoo, congrats!! This reminds me, there was a forum topic that showed when you would get to each new pepper. Anyone know which topic that is?
  21. Jocelyn

    How soon did you decide adoption?

    Thank you for sharing Mandi. I'm glad that you found Abrazo and E&J too. I don't know them personally but via your posts and theirs it seems like you are meant for each other. And the person that will benefit the most is Riley because you all will be family!
  22. Jocelyn

    Baby Announcements 2012

    Congrats Jayson and Kelli! Welcome to the world Baby Yorick!
  23. Jocelyn

    A Birth Grandmother's Role

    Thinking of Lauranda. Have fun in Vegas!
  24. Jocelyn

    A Birth Grandmother's Role

    Where are you going on vacation? I agree that balance between work/school/regular routine and relaxing on a vacation is greatly needed! I just wish the American culture was more geared towards that balance than work, work, work.
  25. Jocelyn

    Baby Announcements 2012

    Congratulations Michael & Sherry and welcome to the world Baby Mirabella!
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