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Bryan&Rebecca

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    St. Louis, Missouri

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    Adopting Parent

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  1. Heidi, I'd have to agree with you. There is no way I would even think about adopting right now (even if it was allowed through an agency). I am 3 months cancer free but still worry about it coming back. I would even be hesitant if I was cancer free for a year. I realize the cancer my never come back but I would be so sad if we adopted and it came back soon after. The child would then have to deal with me going through treatments and possibly losing the battle. I don't understand this couple's thoughts. Hopefully it works out for the best. I would think they would want to wait a little while to give them some security on the cancer not returning. I realize anything can happen to anyone at anytime but I have something that I know about already. -Rebecca
  2. Hey everyone. I went to the doctor today. Everything looks good still - 2 months cancer free. I know I have a long way to go, but every day counts!!
  3. Thank you for the thoughts everyone! I have no idea where the time has gone. I just said to Bryan the other day that I hadn't been on the Abrazo forum in forever. I have been working and finishing up chemo treatments. I would come home and pretty much crash. I was going to bed (and still do) at 8:00 sometimes! I am feeling pretty good. I finished chemo treatments at the beginning of Nov. They said everything looked great. I had some options on what to do from there (chemo once a month being one of them ) I chose to have a check up every 6 weeks. I couldn't even think about doing that! Sorry to worry you all. Rebecca
  4. I contacted my sister that was placed for adoption. We haven't talked in over a year. She was happy to hear from me and wants to get together for a weekend. We said the same thing last year, but I'm going to be more proactive in getting a weekend set up. It feels good to have called. I guess I shouldn't wait so long next time. I guess it is just hard because she has issues with my mom (mainly from when my dad died and she cut herself off from everyone). I feel weird if my mom asks if I've talked with Dina. I don't lie to her, but then I feel in the middle. I guess I'm just going to have to get over that. -Rebecca
  5. So happy for you - can't wait to hear the details and see pics! -Rebecca
  6. Sorry I'm so late......Congratulations Jim and Andrea and Nicole and Raj. -Rebecca
  7. Mari, Your daughter and your family will be in my prayers. You are such a strong woman, I admire you. -Rebecca
  8. Mari, Your strength and faith are an inspiration to me. Thank you for sharing your story and having to relive the pain you went through to reach others. -Rebecca
  9. Happy thoughts go out to Penny, Curtis, Millie and Brett, Barbara, and Holden. Prayers for the first moms and dads also. -Rebecca
  10. I have no idea what birthmothers feel when they make an adoption plan for their child. I can't even imagine... My mom made an adoption plan when she had twins (before she married my dad). I did not find out about it until I was 18 years old (1994) when my "sister" (Dina) called my grandma. She searched out my mom and wanted to meet her. We met her a few months later and had a relationship with her and her family for a few years. Then my dad died and my mom totally shut everyone out. Dina (my sister) pretty much dropped all contact with us. I sent her a bday card every year with an update and little message, but never heard back from her. So about 3 years ago I sent her the bday card and very nicely said I don't know what happened (because at the time I didn't) but if she didn't want to have a relationship anymore I would not try to contact her again. So she called about a year after that card/message and said she did want contact with my sister and me. It was a very emotional phone conversation. She wasn't ready to talk with my mom yet because she felt abandoned for the 2nd time (1st the adoption and 2nd when my mom shut everyone out). My heart went out to her. Our relationship sadly has not gone forward. That conversation was the last one I had with her, and it was about 2 years ago. My heart is sad for how she feels and I wish I could undo how she feels. I just don't know what to do. I don't want to keep calling or writing if she doesn't want contact. I've talked with her mom and her mom stays in contact with my grandma but that's about it. So my situation is a little different but I long for a relationship with my sister and brother (who was adopted with my sister). It would've been AMAZING if we had contact with them as we were growing up. I feel if that were the case we would still be in contact today. I'm not a birthmother who had to make the hardest decision but I am one of the siblings that would be affected. -Rebecca
  11. Missy, We live in Missouri where the adoption laws aren't that great for the adoptive family so we were looking at other options. My husband works with someone who went through Abrazo and raved about them. They adopted their baby fairly quickly and we had heard nothing but LONG waits from other agencies. We went to their orientation in July 2008 and were SO excited afterwards. And of course the forum is such an awesome, supportive place. Everyone on here is so encouraging. They've gotten me through a day or two. The forum friends have been through what you are about to go through so they can help you every step of the way either with advice or just encouragement. -Rebecca
  12. Congrats Tara and Eric. I am so happy for your new family.
  13. Congratulations Denver and Tracey!!!
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