AlexnMomma

I've tried 2 different ways. With the triplets, I just flat out told them about a week after I found out I was pregnant. My dad straight up told me, " You will not come home while pregnant or with a baby" and that is pretty much his same attitude towards them today. It drives me nuts that they wont acknowledge the triplets (my mom will when my Dad isn't around) I understand I didn't make the best choices when I was younger, however, I know I did the best option with what to choose from in the end. With Fiona being so close behind the triplets, I opted not to tell my parents. and I didn't tell them until she was 3 years old. I did it because I didn't want to hurt them, but in the end it ended up hurting my mom just because I didn't tell her and she felt bad she couldn't be there to support me. I would say it depends on the relationship between you and your parents. Coming from an adoptive friendly home myself I knew/know that they would accept that decision even though they weren't happy I had to make it.

Alrighty, well I looked for something along these lines and didn't find it, so I figured I'd start this new topic. For all the propective birthparents out there I want to share something with you that I now know and learned the hard way. When you are trying to find the "Right" Match and if you start calling the Birthmother Lines that propective AP's have set up. Please remember this. You are NOT obligated by any means to match with them just because you called them, or even if you meet with them and decide that something just doesn't fit. I myself in my mind, felt like I was almost committing fraud after I had called 3 different couples about the triplets adoption (even though I didn't know I was having triplets at thta point) the first 2 I called they just didn't sit right with me. But when I called Gabe and Lisa everything seemed just right. But for the same reason that I didn't call any prospective AP's except for the AP's of FIona. and I probably should have, there were a lot of little "signals" that I should have seen but I choose to ignore. Now I see that, but to little too late. On the AP side, I know everytime that phone rings their heart jumps, but I also know that a lot of them wont even starting being hopeful until the 2nd-3rd call. Other BP's and AP's please post your feelings on this too. I really wish I would have had someone to tell me this when I was pregnant! and choosing AP's! Thanks

I think everyone questions what this is supposed to look like. The chicks will send you some samples at some point. The colors are as you wish, the seriousness is as you wish, make it personal. The person who picks yours out of the pile will love it because of your touch. good luck and welcome! Lori I agree. Use what says "YOU" dont think about it too much Just be you and do what YOU like! I have found thats the best place to start!

This story has bothered me from the get go. At first when I heard "octuplets" I thought , "oh cool a family that has obviously been trying to have kids finally got 8!!" Then I heard the rest of the story. I have tried to watch interview with the BGP's and the mom on TV but honestly it makes me SICK!! I dont even know what to think! I know that if they did decide to use an adoption plan. That those babies would more than likely have to be split up. Im mean honestly how many AP's out there are ready to or could even adopt 8 kids. The reason I say this is being a BP of triplets, I remember how angry I was when I found out another TX Agency (not Abrazo) that I had spoken to was going to spilt up the triplets. I dont think thats right. Multiples thrive off of each other. So to seperate them could be detrimental in the long run. Anyway, like I said, this story really frustrates me because its just a HUGE mess to begin with!! And I think it is TOTALLY irresponisble of the Mom who is already living with her parents to go and get IVF AGAIN~!!!! What was she thinking??? Sheesh! Ok thats my 2 cents

There are only 4 candles burning right now!!

I FINALLY got to watch this movie the other day. To me, it felt right. As far as her keeping her decision to place with Vanessa even after the split. When you feel the "match" it would be devestating (to me) at that point in the game to have to decide. I probably would have made the same choice she did.

Congrats to the newest Families!! I love the gallery PIctures!!

Im not sure what to think here. I think some laws are rediculous. I can see the removal of the child in the first place however, the law that doesn't allow any recourse in the state of the parent being wrongly accused is what I don't like. Im glad however, she was able to keep her daughter, but I thought the whole supervisory visits was a little bit of any over kill. And for 11 months!! Thats Crazy!!

CONGRATS!!! Hendrick, John and Nina on your newest addition!!

Here is a link to my new found friend Alicia's Adoption Story, I read it shortly after I started chatting with her, but she has a "forced Closed adoption" Here's her story: http://www.birthmombuds.com/showcase_alicia.htm

Our candles could use a little attention. There are only 7 burning!! And they are ALL about to go out!!

I wanted to give an update and a praise. I just got word that our pilot that was shot the other day made it to DC had the operation, and he is doing well!! (besides the bullet hole in his leg) He is now the first purple heart recipient in our squadron for this tour!! however, he will not be rejoining us out here!! Thank you everyone for your prayers!!

Congratulations Paul and Fabi on your New beautiful Son!!

There are only 2 candles burning and one is about to go out!!

Thats Very Sad!! Just shows more info about Adoption needs to be put out!! Somehow, somewhere, by Someone!!

I have and will keep the mini candle for my birthmom! on my desktop!! As a constant reminder of the loving yet difficult decision she choose to make!! I have and will keep the mini candle for my birthmom! on my desktop!! As a constant reminder of the loving yet difficult decision she choose to make!! We also went from 3 to 34 candles in less than 24 hrs!! !-) Very encouraging!!

I lit and will keep lit a candle for my Birthmother until I find her!

I finally got it to work!!

I lit two but when I went back, they both weren't there. What am I doing wrong??

I read this article, however, Im not quite sure how I feel about it. Parts of it made me angry, parts made me sad, I can only imagine what the author felt as she wrote this!! It was a great story!! Im glad she was able to realize this and wasn't "Paralyzed" by sterotypes of birthmothers from back in the day!

Sending up a prayer for a New Perfect Match to be Formed!! And for the Birthmothers Strength and a Healthy Baby!

IM just wondering the AP's who adopt through such agencies, are they uneducated as far as What open adoption is and the benefits of if it? Or are they just desperate and Want a Baby Now? Or is it "cheaper" to get a baby this way??