laneybug

"Rockabye sweet baby James!" Congrats to the new family!

Congratulations everyone!

Anyone want to talk about Justin Harris, politician from Arkansas who informally "rehomed" his daughters 6 months after they were adopted? After trying exorcisms to change their behavior? And now claims he wasn't told about their behavior issues? I could go on- google his name, and you'll find all manner of atrocities done by the legal (and not really legal) guardians of these children. This makes me so angry, sad, and sick.

This was a very interesting read! We aren't anywhere near thinking if baby #2 but it's still good information. I can certainly understand the distraction issue- when I'm taking care of Kepler, especially outside of my house, it's extremely hard to pay full attention to anything else. I brought him to a funeral when he was 1 month old and my husband was unable to come with me, and I found it so difficult. My brain was too distracted with parenting a newborn baby to be able to fully engage with the people I was hoping to connect with and comfort- my friends whose brother had died. It was a jarring experience, and I felt like I failed at being a friend because I was so preoccupied with being a mother. I can imagine this hyper-focus might decrease as Kepler gets more independent, but I can also imagine that the priority of parenting will probably always be an additional challenge in highly emotional situations. And yet... Children can sometimes be ice-breakers. Birth parents and adoptive parents sometimes have so few things in common. Compassion for small creatures can be a bonding experience, and something to help get over that awkwardness of getting to know each other in this emotionally complicated situation. Not that children should be *used* this way- only that, sometimes they can help build bridges between people. A birth mother who is worried about feeling judged by parents in waiting might feel more at ease with a child who would, presumably, be less judgmental...? And even as I write it I realize: it shouldn't be a child's job to break the ice or build the bridge. The adults will be the ones in charge of their relationships, so they should lead the charge to find connections.

Congrats everyone!

So disturbing. And a reminder about why there are so many hoops to jump through with adoption- hopefully the lengthy and involved process keeps some abuse from happening.

OMG do you mean me? Okay here's how I feel about this: 1. Beers, yes. Absolutely, 100 times yes. 2. I can already imagine some pretty intense poetry about Mari, the legend. Floating about the forum, dipping into everyone's stories here and there. You bring, paradoxically, levity and gravitas-- an important lightness-- to our worlds. In moments of indescribable sorrow, you are empathy. In moments of unstoppable joy, you are trumpets and flowers. A thread weaving in and out of our lives, comforting us with your love, you say, "I'm here. I'm listening." And 3. I think Lauranda and I can agree that this is all pointless because you will never need a eulogy, you will never die, stop talking about our mom like that. XO Laney

Congratulations !! and because of American Ninja Warrior, which is awesome.

Have fun in Vegas! This is going to sound stupid, but the Walgreens stores on the strip are really amazing- if you need to duck into an air-conditioned place for a minute or two, or to pick up FRESH VEGETABLES or extra flip-flops, I recommend it.

Thanks everyone!!

Omigosh you're talking about US! My husband and I are so excited for the orientation in less than 2 weeks!!! New Orleans is just a hop, skip, and a jump from Texas (the border, anyway) and we can't wait to meet y'all. Thank you thank you thank you Lindsey and Elizabeth!