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vanfam

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About vanfam

  • Birthday February 24

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    Female
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    Faribault, MN

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    Adopting Parent

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  1. Just wanted to wish you a most happy and wondeful birthday.

    with love,

    -The Abrazo chicks

  2. Congratulations Jill and Andy! So happy for you!
  3. Congratulations to everyone! Mark & Erin and Ric & Teresa, you've all waited such a long time - we're very happy for you.
  4. Just putting in my two cents...I worked as an insurance agent for 14 years and just left the industry in April, so this info should be fairly accurate. The first thing to remember is that all of this info is general - the laws and the coverage will differ from state to state and company to company. As an adoptive parent, the laws of your state (noth the birth state) will be the ones that come in to play. Very few companies will provide coverage at birth since you have not legally become responsible for the child. Prior to actual placement, you have no legal tie to that child, it's a good-faith contract that the birthmother will place her child with you, or for that matter, that you will accept the child. (Let's be honest, placement may not happen for any number of reasons on either side.) Once placement occurs, a company MAY agree to provide retro-active coverage back to the date of birth - again, this will vary from company to company and it's always best to call your hotline to find out. As for the social security number, if you explain the situation to you company they will be able to make an exception. Adoptions do not need to be finalized for coverage to occur - that really should be nationwide. Also, if there are pre-existing health issues (preemie, jaundice, etc) your company should be covering those costs from the time of placement, again, if you KNOW that there will be health issues, double check with your company. But, it shouldn't be a problem since most companies look at placement date just as they would a birth date. Hope this helps.
  5. Lori - I think that the guilt is normal, and in a way, healthy. There are days when I'm horror-stricken about how Rosa must have felt knowing that some complete stranger was going to be raising her daughter. On those same days, I feel guilty and also incredibly grateful. I will never be able to clearly express those feelings to anyone that hasn't been through a similar experience - which is why it's nice for all of us to have each other. The worst days, for me and I would imagine for Rosa too, are Elena's birthday and the day we brought her home. It's a very odd situation to have the happiest of days also bring on guilt. My guess is, if we didn't have the love and respect for these amazing women, then we wouldn't feel the guilt...guess I'm ok with feeling it when you look at it that way. I don't know if this is helpful, but I wanted you to know that you're not alone. faith
  6. Congratulations - what a beautiful baby boy!
  7. Yeah Lori & Bill....we're wicked excited and can't wait to see pictures!!
  8. I can only offer what I understand...as a general "rule" birthmoms tend to favor families that don't already have children. It's not because they want they're child to be an only child, just possibly the first child. We are one of the waiting families that already have a child - and we haven't had many phone calls from interested birthmoms. (I really hope that it's not because our profile stinks!) Elizabeth did tell us that "It will happen" but for most families that are already raising children it tends to take longer to be matched. There was a post in the "New parents needed" thread that talked a little more about the reasoning. Faith
  9. Thanks Kristal! As the mother to a 4 year old daughter and an Abrazo "PIW , it's encouraging to know we will be the "right" family for someone! Faith
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